Not a Damsel
by satanisafangirl
Summary: While working a case, Dean is put under a powerful curse that swaps his gender, forcing Team Free Will to search for a solution while fighting off the angels. Destiel, Fem!Dean
1. Chapter 1

**{Disclaimer: Supernatural is not mine, as much as I wish it was**

**Genre: Humor, romance, drama**

**Rating: T in the beginning, M down the road**

**Author Notes: Hopefully this fic won't be too long. Less then twenty chapters, I think. Anyway, I don't write fanfiction often so any feedback would be greatly appreciated. If there are any spelling or grammatical errors, I apologize. Myself and my betas do try. Thank you and enjoy.}**

••••••

"Sammy," a rough voice came from under the cheap motel comforter. "Coffee... black."

"On the nightstand," Sam said while staring at his laptop screen, checking the time. Nearly noon. "Dean, we don't have all day."

A horrendous groan came from under the covers as Dean slowly and painstakingly sat up. "Don't be such a girl. We've got plenty of time," he said as he finally became upright. His joints ached, not just from the night of hard drinking and women, but the line of work the Winchesters were in... Hunters... eventually left one with cartilage and nerve damage. It was common among them because of all the abuse they went under for the job: Thrown by ghosts, hit by demons, bones broken by a windigo, scratches from werewolves. It was just a part of the job. Dean took a quick assessment of his body, all of the normal aches and pains present, nothing out of the ordinary... well at least not for what he does for a living. He tried to imagine how a civilian would react to being thrown around a room by a vengeful ghost. Or worse, being torn apart by hellhounds. Dean shuddered and dropped the thought as quickly as he picked it up.  
He'd been blankly staring at the wall until he snapped out of it and reached out for the cup of coffee. When he took a sip, he nearly spit it out. "It's cold," he begrudgingly said as he stared down at it.

"Well, had you gotten up before noon, I'm sure it would've been hot," Sam said looking at Dean from the corner of his eye.

"Yeah yeah," the older brother said waving his free hand at Sam. He finally looked over and saw that his younger brother had showered, dressed in his suit and straightened up the room while waiting for Dean to wake up.

Dean stood out of bed and took another sip of the cold coffee. With a sour expression, he sat it back down and got dressed begrudgingly in his very uncomfortable suit and tie. While he laced up his shoes, Sam started to talk about the case. "Okay, so two days ago, fourteen women went to full term pregnancy overnight and gave birth the next day. We've never seen anything like this before, to be honest, I have no theories. After we grab some food, we should go interview a few of them."

"This is buckets full of crazy. You called Bobby about it yet?" his shoes laced, he stood and gave a final stretch before quickly brushing his teeth.

Sam answered while absentmindedly looking over his screen, "Not yet. I wanted to talk to a few before. I'm not really sure what to make of all of this, Dean. The newspapers have been going crazy over it; there have already been half dozen different articles about it." He leaned back in his chair and waited for his older brother to finish getting ready.

"Let's get this show on the road," Dean fished through his jacket sitting on the chair opposite Sam. He grabbed onto his keys and they went to work.

••••••

They both stood in front of a large yellow house, the lawn manicured and the cars in the driveway clean. Dean looked around at the matching houses and lawns, noticing that Sam looked almost wishful. The door opened in front of them to show a couple in their late forties, well dressed and attractive for their age. The woman was brunette and had soft brown eyes and the man was red headed with light grey irises. He placed his arm around his wife's waist and smiled at the Winchesters standing on his porch.

"Hi, Mr. and Mrs. Field, I'm Agent Zant and this is my partner Agent Bonham," Sam said as they both flashed their badges and put them back in the suit pocket.

"We're with the FBI, would you mind if we asked you a few questions?"

"Sure, please, come in," the wife said while showing them inside. If the outside looked nice, the inside looked even better.

The usual questions: Cold spots? Sulfur? Anything unusual? Nothing. Even the little baby, Jeffery, looked completely normal. Healthy, even.

Mrs. Fields held her son as Dean and Sam talked to the couple. They both seemed extraordinarily happy and proud. "We can't explain it, I mean, there's just no reasonable explanation," the husband said while adoringly staring at his wife and child.

The wife looked up from Jeffery. "We've been trying for fifteen years now, and suddenly we're given this miracle. Maybe it was God?" she asked with a smile.

Dean thought bitterly '_definitely not'_, but he kept it to himself. Instead he smiled and looked at the happy family "Maybe it was. Here are our cards if you have any other information."

"Thank you for your time," Sam said before they left.

••••••

The brothers sat in the Impala, trying to think about everything. "Thirteen more to go," Sam said looking at the lost of people he had written from the articles. Dean sighed and drove the next house... after seven, they had nothing.

"Same thing for all of them: Been trying for a child, then overnight their wish comes true. I don't think it's a Djinn. I'm not sure what else it could be," Sam stared at his list, directing Dean to the ninth house. "I mean, whatever it is can't be too bad, can it? It's not like it's a bad thing what it's doing, Weird as hell, but not bad."

Dean tapped the steering wheel, "I don't like monster grey areas."

At house number nine, they notice a large herbal garden to the side of the house. "Dude, look," Dean nudged Sam towards the garden.

"Witch, you think?" Sam's voice low.

"Dunno. Let's get this over with." Dean didn't have to explain why he hated witches so much.

A kind middle aged woman answered the door, invited them in and made them tea. Neither of them drank it, for dear of what she could have put in it.

"Mrs. Drave-"

"Miss Drave," she corrected Dean with a smile. She pushed her blonde hair behind her ear and tapped her foot on the carpeted floor.

Dean returned the smile with charm, "Miss Drave, have you noticed anything weird in the last few days... besides... you know?"

"Hmmm... not that I can think of. It's all been a bit of a blur. Woke up and I was as big as a house! I tell ya, though; that was the most excited I'd ever been to go the hospital. I'd actually thought I was dreaming at first, but then I realized it was all very real. Want to see my little girl?" she asked.  
So far, the Winchesters found nothing odd with the babies, even dabbing some salt on their fingers or holy water... no reaction. However, it was rude to turn down a proud parent.

"If you don't mind," Sam said, eyeing his tea warily.

Miss Drave showed them down a hallway into the baby's room. It was the most well prepared nursery they'd seen so far. The walls were painted pink, and even her name "Lily" was painted above the crib. The baby lay amongst the blankets and stuffed animals, fast asleep in her crib. Sam and Dean made eye contact for a brief moment and then went back to looking around.

"She's beautiful. And you had this nursery set up so quickly," the taller man said, eyeing the woman's reaction.

She laughed lightly and shrugged her shoulders, "I've had this here for years. Always wanted a baby."

"Can you tell us anything about the father?" Dean asked.

Before she answered, Sam questioned her on where her bathroom was. He excused himself and left the nursery.

"The father is my boyfriend. He still doesn't know what to think about all of this..." Miss Draves looked at her daughter with love in her eyes. "I couldn't be happier, though."

"Would you mind giving us his name? In case we have any questions for him."

"It's Scott Harper. If you get into contact with him, could you let me know? I haven't heard from him since..." she trailed off.

Sam came back into the room and nodded towards Dean. "Well thank you for your time. My partner will you give you our cards and you can call us anytime."

Dean pulled out their cards and handed it to the woman. "Congratulations on the baby."

She had a huge toothy grin, "Thank you dear."

••••••

The leather interior of the Impala was hot as they waited for the AC to kick in. "Did you find anything?" The older brother asked, loosening his tie.

Sam fished an item of his pocket, showing it to his brother. A piece of papyrus with hieroglyphics painted on it and a goddess underneath. "She had an entire alter set up, but it didn't look like any black magic. I'll call Bobby about it, but I'll do my own research when we get back to the motel."

"Any guesses about who that alter was set up for, Sammy?" Dean put Baby in reverse and began the drive back to temporary home.

"I don't know," he looked back down at the papyrus. "Off the top of my head, could be an Egyptian goddess."

"I hate dealing with those freaks," Dean clenched the wheel and looked over at Sam. "Gods... goddesses... remember when this was just ghosts, demons, the occasional werewolf?"

Sam let out a small laugh, "Yeah, that was before angels. Ever since then, it's been complicated... I mean more so than usual." He absentmindedly rubbed his hands on his thighs. "Best not to think too much about it."

"Yeah, I guess." The angels had completely thrown things out of whack, Dean thought. Cas made his big entrance and everything the Winchester's knew was thrown out the window. God... angels... vessels. Dean was always thinking about it, the way their lives were flipped upside down.

••••••

Dean spoke to his brother walking behind him while unlocking the motel door. "Sammy, I'm gonna take a shower and-" The door swung open, a woman standing in he middle of the room interrupted Dean.

"Sam and Dean Winchester?" her voice was commanding yet still soft. Her skin was a warm mocha and her straight black hair went past her waist. She wore a light blue sundress and gold sandals. The woman was beautiful, yet something about her said she was deadly and powerful.

Instinctively, Dean grabbed for his knife but didn't pull it out quite yet. "Yeah. Who the hell are you?" Sam was right beside him, his gun out and aimed.

"No need for the hostility. Just want to talk. Lower your weapons or I will do it for you." Yep, there was the deadly. Neither of the boys moved. The woman rolled her eyes and waved her hand, the knife and gun ripped out of their hands, landing with a clatter on the floor. "To answer your question, I am Isis. Heard you were in town and wanted to have a chat."

The brothers looked at one another. Sam broke their silence "So you're the one who..."

"Who gave barren women children? Yes. They all prayed to God every night for sons and daughters, but you both know that's the wrong person you should give your prayers to. God will do nothing, even for his most dedicated followers." Isis walked back and fourth as she spoke, still looking at Sam and Dean.

"Amanda Draves summoned me; woke me from a three hundred year slumber. I was only too happy to give her the daughter she's always wanted, along with the other families in this town." She stopped pacing and stood directly in front of the boys. "Do not try to interfere with me, or you will be punished. I plan to spread my miracles around, be an active goddess. Do I make myself clear?"

Sam seemed to relax but Dean remained prostrate and at a defensive position. "So what, we just let you go?" Dean asked angrily.

"Dean, it's not like she's doing anything bad. Why should we stop her?" Sam tried to convince his brother. Dean wanted to give in as easily as Sam did, but he could hear John in the back of his head, telling him different.

"What's in it for you, Isis? Huh? Going around, making everyone a big happy family? I call bull. Nobody does anything for anybody without a price. So what's yours?" Something flashed in her eyes, quick and almost unnoticeable but Dean knew this wasn't just for the good of the people. There was malice under the helpful facade.

"Don't get in my way, Dean Winchester, or I will be forced to punish you." Isis glared at him.

"Sorry honey, I'm not into that kind of thing," he grabbed for his knife off the floor and lunged towards the goddess. With ease, she grabbed Dean's wrist and squeezed it until he released his blade.

"Tsk tsk tsk. I warned you. Now-" she wrapped her other hand around his neck and squeezed. Sam grabbed his gun off the floor and fired three shots into her chest. Isis raised her eyebrows and looked at Sam, unmoving. "I liked this dress." She released Dean and threw him across the room, begrudgingly looking down at her bloodied dress.

The older brother landed flat on his back, coughing loudly and curling onto his side before standing up like a true solider. He swayed and Sam ran over to catch him.

"Dean... Sam... it was lovely meeting you both. I'm sure I'll be hearing from you soon." And with a slight nod, she was gone.

Dean sat back on the floor and let out more choking coughs until it finally passed. Sam checked around the room for hex bags or a token like it. After a thorough search, he leant a hand to Dean. He stood with his brother's help and did his own check, just to be sure.

"What do you think she meant she'll be hearing from us?" Sam asked while pulling out his laptop, preparing to research Isis.

While talking, Dean started undressing until he was in his boxers. "No clue. We've got to find out how to gank the bitch. Something doesn't seem right." He collected his dirty clothes and set them out to be cleaned later and grabbed a towel.

••••••

Sam had several windows up on his laptop, bouncing back and forth from myth to myth, trying to piece any information together. He heard the shower stop running, waiting to give Dean the information he'd found, sorting through what was important and what wasn't.

"What?! SAMMY!" he heard Dean yell from the other room.

"Dean!" the younger brother jumped out of his chair so hard, it fell over backwards. He ran to the bathroom and threw the door open, steam rolling out. "D...Dean?"

Sam stood wide eyed as he absorbed what he was seeing. A woman with light honey brown hair and shocking green eyes stood in the bathroom with a towel wrapped around her. She had freckles on her cheeks and a few on her neck. The towel didn't cover the anti-possession pentagram tattoo under her left collarbone, and the samulet hung from her neck. Nothing short of horror was on her face.

It took a second for it to process for Sam... Dean _was the woman_. "Oh my god..." he put a hand over his mouth and stared at Dean in shock.  
{CHAPTER END}


	2. Chapter 2

**{When referring to Dean, I will still use a masculine pronoun.}**

The brothers(sister?) stood there, unmoving. As soon as Sam slumped against the door frame, Dean prayed in panic "Cas, get your ass down here!"  
With a flutter of wings, Castiel appeared in between Sam and Dean. They stood uncomfortably close together in the tiny bathroom, steam still clinging to the mirror making the room hot and muggy. It was silent for what felt like hours but was a few seconds. Dean finally had to adjust his towel above his breasts to keep it from slipping, wishing the crappy motel towels were larger. It barely covered his torso and hips.

He felt uncomfortable as the angel looked up and down Dean's female body, unable to read his expression. "Cas?" his voice low and desperate.  
"Dean... how did you... become a woman?" Castiel's voice deep and earnest.

Sam intervened, "We wanted to ask you that. Is it even possible for someone to change genders like this?"

"It's," Cas looked over to Sam, "very rare. It would take a powerful being to change someone's sex. They would have to possess formidable magic."

"I don't care how it's happened. Can it be undone? Cas?" Dean asked with urgency.

The dark haired angel looked back to his charge to answer. "We would have to determine who caused this. It could be permanent."

"PERMANENT?!" Dean went into full panic and pushed past Castiel and his brother, gripping the towel tighter around his feminine body. He stomped to his bag and pulled out a clean set of clothes. The towel still barely wrapped around him, he went back into the bathroom, the other two just watching Dean's reaction unfold, unspeaking or unmoving. It was silent until Dean pointedly stared back. "Get the hell out!"

They both moved out of the bathroom and watched the door slam behind them. Dean, now alone, dropped the towel and looked down. He leaned back on the counter and took deep breathes, trying his damnedest to calm himself down.

The door cracked open, Castiel leaning around it, "Dean, I believe we have come to a conclusion of how-" Dean, still naked pushed Castiel's face out the door and slammed it shut. He locked it loudly and leaned with his back against the door, his wet hair sticking to him. This was a nightmare, an absolute nightmare. Dean waited to wake up, but it never came. This... was real. "Shit shit shit," he kept saying to himself as he put on his clothes. The boxers barely hung on to his hips, and the pants sagged down, his legs lost in the material. While looking in the steamy mirror, he saw the black t-shirt fit on him like he was a child. His shoulder blade long hair was tangled and nappy, getting the back of his shirt wet. Staring at the reflection of his face, he saw how it was still him. Same lips and eyes, but his scruff was gone. The strong jaw now a gentler curve. Thicker eyelashes and thinner more arched eyebrows. There was no doubt, he was beautiful.

Dean continued to look at his new self, observing his face and body. After a few minutes, he heard a knock on the door, "Dean?" Sam's voice came through the door. "Uh, Cas and I talked and we're pretty sure we know how you... you... you know. He's at Bobby's right now, trying to dig up information."  
That calmed Dean slightly, knowing Cas wasn't in the room. It was bad enough having his younger brother see him like this, but it felt all too embarrassing seeing the angel look at him. Dean took a deep breathe and opened the door.

Sam was seated at the computer, although paying no attention to it. His eyes were fixated on Dean as he awkwardly sat down.

"Are you alright?" Sam asked hesitantly. It was the first thing he thought to say, and probably the dumbest.

"Am I _alright_? No, no I'm not alright. I'm pretty far from alright. And would you stop staring?!" Dean's voice defensive and angry. The younger brother immediately averted his eyes to the screen, although he wasn't really looking at it.

"Dumb question. Alright-" Sam saw the glare Dean gave him and corrected himself, "okay... Cas and I think it was Isis. I'm pretty sure this is what she meant when she said punishment and after some research, she's goddess of fertility and pretty much all things womanly. It would fit her style."

Slowly processing everything, Dean clenched his hands into fists, smaller than he was used to. "So we find that bitch, and then what?"

All Sam could do was shrug his shoulders, "I mean, I don't know if icing her will fix the problem, or if we even can. Gods and goddesses are always difficult. Some kind of special ritual or weapon."

With a heavy sigh, Dean leaned back in the chair, "Why can't it just be easy for once? Always has to be steel blessed by a deranged monkey and soaked in the urine of a goat. Or a walnut branch on fire. Can't it be 'stab it with a knife'?" his words coming out in a rush of frustration.

"Uh... I... I guess not. Hopefully Bobby can find something. In the meantime, we should go back to Amanda Draves' house, ask her about her summoning ritual," the younger brother said while eyeing Dean.

"Let's get going then," Dean tried lowering his voice to compensate for the higher pitch, but it didn't do much good in making him sound any more like a man.

"Dean..." Sam was weary of upsetting his already volatile brother.

"What?"

"We can't... really go out with you looking like that. At least we can't question anyone."

"What's wrong with the way I look?" the older brother daring Sam to say something.

"You're clothes don't fit, and your hair..." his sentence trailed off as we watched his brother try to run his fingers through his tangled hair.

"Jesus, how am I supposed to get this out?"

With a small and playful smile, Sam walked across the room to pull his hairbrush out of his bag. He placed it on the table in front of Dean, sitting back down.

Growling, "Really? Fan-friggen-tastic." Dean rolled his eyes and held the brush to his hair. He roughly tried to tear through the matted mess, cringing as it did little good.

"Stop stop stop. You're killing me," Sam stood from his chair and held out his hand in front of Dean. He was met with an angry stare, but reluctantly handed the brush over. Tenderly, Sam ran the brush through Dean's hair. Gently and patiently, Sam brushed away the knots. Dean crossed his arms stubbornly over his chest, thrown off by the presence of breasts.

His expression was nothing short of loathsome, "This is beyond the girliest thing I've ever done." Dean was a "man's man" and there he sat, having his hair combed like a girl... oh wait, he actually was a girl.

Sam let out a chuckle and shook his head, "It's not so bad. There. That better?"

Sighing, Dean ran a hand through his hair and although he didn't want to admit it, it had improved. "Yeah, whatever. So are you saying I should... dress like a woman? Because I see nothing wrong with wearing my own clothes."

"No offense, but you look like a little girl wearing her dad's clothes. Let's get you something that'll at least... fit. I mean, we also have to prepare for the idea that this could be... perma-" Sam was interrupted by Dean holding up his hand.

"Don't say it."

"Fine," Sam threw up his hands in surrender, "but it doesn't change it. We need to get you new clothes, though, because we have to blend in. Right now, you'll stick out in a crowd."

With much reluctance and arguing, Sam convinced Dean to go shopping. They stood in a crowded mall, unfortunately the closest and only shopping center in the area.

"Do we really have to do this?" Dean pouted, glaring at everyone nearby.

"No, but it's really too amusing to pass up. Here," Sam pointed to a store, "looks like they have something you'd like."

Unable to see over the crowd like he was used to, Dean looked up at his brother, "Like what?"

Sam patted Dean's shoulder and let out a hearty laugh. "Plaid." Truer words have never been spoken.

In the store, Dean caught a glimpse of himself in a mirror, really surveying himself surrounded by people. He did look strange, a woman wearing unfitting clothes. He hated admitting Sam was correct, but he couldn't walk around like this.

Along the walls were different styles of shirts, a large pallet of colors and patterns. It was all extremely overwhelming, until Dean found a section made up of plaid and neutral tones shirts. Sam stood beside him, trying to hide the huge grin on his face as he watched Dean grab an armful of black, grey, and olive colored tshirts, along with various plaid patterns. "There. Let's get some pants and leave," he said as he walked over to the jean racks. "Ah shit... what size am I?" Dean asked earnestly.

"I don't know... we could ask someone? Here, give me a second," Sam stepped over to an employee tagging shirts. She looked up from her work when he approached, "Excuse me miss, my br-sister doesn't know her pants size. Would you mind helping us?"

"Of course," she said brightly. "Oh," she spotted Dean, holding his clothes and trying to keep up his pants... an apparent woman wearing large clothing, standing bow-legged while staring steely at the different pairs of pants. "What's her name?"

"...Deanna."

"Okie dokie!" The employee bounded over to Dean with a smile. "Hi Deanna! I'm Jennifer. I heard you were having troubles choosing pants. Can I measure you?"

Thrown back by the cheerfulness, Dean nodded. He handed his armful of shirts to Sam, "Make yourself useful."

What was an armful for Dean, was easily draped over Sam's forearm. Sam raised an eyebrow as Jennifer wrapped measuring tape around Dean's hips.

"You're quite small under all these clothes. You're a size three. So here," Jennifer pointed to a rack, "is where you'll find your size. Find me if you need any more help."

"Thanks," Dean said awkwardly. Jennifer left to help another customer, leaving Dean to look over the different cuts and colors. He grabbed black, grey, dark blue, and brown from the racks, not looking at what kind they were.

"You sure you don't want to try them on?" the younger brother asked, but knowing what Dean would already say.

"Nah. They can't be that different. Let's just get out of this hellhole," Dean dropped the clothes on the register counter. "Pay for these, I'll go grab some shoes," his voice cool.

With a roll of his eyes, Sam pulled out a credit card to pay for the clothing. He thought, _Thank god for identity theft_, as he saw the extreme pricing of clothes, even though they were already on sale.

Meanwhile, Dean shoved his feet into size seven boots after being measured. They were unremarkable, black and no heel, normal strings for laces. "That'll do." He saw Sam walking over with the bag. "Okay, let's go back to the motel."

"You planning on stealing those boots?"

After a pause, Dean smiled, "Well… yeah. Let's go before someone sees."

They quickly left the store, Sam's face disapproving as they walked along the shops, looking for an exit. Suddenly, the younger brother stopped.

"Why'd you stop?" asked Dean.

"We forgot one last thing."

"What?"

With a smirk, Sam pointed to the shop next to them. Dean read the words in horror. "No. No. I refuse."

There they stood, in front of a store covered in pink with perfumey smells rolling out. A man in a woman's body worse nightmare: Victoria Secret.

{Chapter End}


	3. Chapter 3

"This's too far, Sammy." Dean dug his heels into the ground as his younger brother guided him into the store. The treads on his new boots were not near as gripping as his other pair, much to his dismay as Sam pushed him into the entrance.

"Come on, do you plan on wearing the whole time you're cursed?" the moose asked with a laugh.

"Fuck, I didn't think about that. Damn it. Damn it damn it damn it," the older brother ran his fingers through his long hair. "Just... go away," he gave in with a sigh.

"That's my girl," Sam patted his brother's shoulder.

"I_ will _kill you," Dean's voice was full of venom as he resisted the urge to beat the hell out of his brother, ripping his bag out of Sam's hands. As he went further into the store, a devious plot came into mind. Dean was always a good actor, had to be in his business. He went up to the nearest employee, a young woman with olive toned skin. "Excuse me, miss?"

The woman took in Dean's disheveled state and then asked "How may I help you?"

Pointing to his brother who stood outside the shop, he leaned in close to the employee, "Do you see that tall man? He's been following me around and is giving me the creeps. Can you keep him from coming in here?"

The woman's eyes went wide and she glared towards Sam, who was not paying attention to Dean, "Of course." She turned away and mumbled something into her earpiece then turned back towards Dean. "We've got this under control. Please come to me if you need anything else."

"Thank you," his voice sweet, now that he wasn't trying to sound like his usual self. He turned towards his brother, Sam now looking at him questionably. A security guard walked up to Sam and started talking to him. Dean gave a little wave and turned his back to look at the racks and shelves of lingerie. Last he saw of Sam, was him being pulled away with a very confused look on his face.

He laughed inwardly, knowing Sammy could handle himself and that he could get out of any situation. Mall cops aren't that hard ass, anyway. Now that he was able to really look around, he felt even more overwhelmed at all of the bras and panties hanging from the walls and sitting on islands across the store. So many styles, colors, shapes, patterns. He nearly dropped his bag as he searched the room for some sanity.

Another employee, blonde and very busty, walked up to Dean. "Would you like some help?"

It was against Dean's nature to accept help so much, but he truly was clueless. "Uh... yeah."

"So what are you looking for? Something cute, sexy-"

"Simple?" he tried to hide his panic.

"M'kay, simple. Follow me," she lead Dean to an area with white, black, crimson, and dark purple bras hung, the matching underwear on a shelf underneath. "This is a simple collection, meant to go under t-shirts yet still give a bit of cleavage. Everything is made of satin and the lace is very soft. Good for everyday use or a special occasion. What do you think?"

Blankly, he nodded and stepped forward to further examine the selection.

"Would you like me to measure you?"

He nodded again, suddenly becoming more shy. She instructed him to lift his arms up and hold still. Following her orders, Dean felt a blush creep up his cheeks as the employee measured his ribcage and his bust. "Are you wearing a bra right now?"

"No," feeling self conscious as she wrapped his breasts. He looked to the side until she pulled the tape away.

"Alright, you are a 34B. What color would you like to try?"

"All of them," he was hoping to steal a few pairs.

"Awesome," the employee grabbed each color bra and matching underwear, leading Dean back to a fitting room. "Here you are," she unlocked the door at the end of the hall, amongst several other door and set the underwear on a small bench.

"Thanks," Dean said to the retreating blonde.

"You're welcome. If you need anything, just holler," shutting the door behind her.

Awkwardly, Dean took off all of his clothes, leaving him in just his loose fitting boxers. The small pink room had a large mirror covering a whole wall, a bench on the opposite end, a white door and soft cream carpet. He glanced over to the mirror and saw a few of his old scars on his skin. The jagged scratch from a werewolf on his right shoulder (it still ached to this day), a cut on his left thigh where a desk had been slammed into him, several small scars across his stomach from various injuries. It was still weird to see his body as female, staring at his own breasts. He realized how weird he was being and snapped himself out of it.

Easily, he put on a pair of dark purple panties. They were unexpectedly uncomfortable, Dean suddenly realizing how irritating it must be to wear woman's underwear all the time. The satin felt great, reminding him of when he tried on a pair of pink satin panties for a girl. He snickered to himself as he thought about it, seeing where he was now. Then he picked up the small matching bra... studying it. "How do you even put this on?" Dean asked out loud.

It took ten whole minutes for Dean to figure out how to clip the hooks and get his arms through the straps. Turning towards the mirror, he looked at himself, admiring his body. He turned to his side to see himself from behind, an approving look on his face. The bra was uncomfortable and the panties went places he really didn't want them to, yet he couldn't help but admit that he looked good. "I'm hot," he said, a giant grin across his face. Although, he was a bit self conscious about the size of his breasts, in comparison to the busty employee. Now, he understood why women got surgeries for larger busts, feeling insecure about himself (as weird as it was for him to think about).

"Not like it matters, though," still hoping they'd find a way to reverse this curse. Dean had been waiting for a call from Bobby or an appearance from Cas, hopefully bearing good news, but, so far, he'd heard nothing from either of them.

As he was standing in the satin and lace lingerie, he contemplated how he would steal the garments after he looked at the outrageous price tags. On one of the tags, he saw it said "cheeky cut" panties and a "demi cut bra," unsure of what it meant. If these cheekies were uncomfortable, Dean couldn't imagine how it would be to wear a thong or a full corset. He was slowly gaining a new respect for what women had to go through.

Occasionally, he'd look back to the mirror and smirked at his reflection, pleased with his overall appearance.

Dean put all of the garments in his shopping bag (besides what he was wearing) then pulled out a pair of pants and t-shirt, getting ready to dress.

As he was bent over, about to pick up the clothes, he heard a flutter of wings behind him. To his surprise, he looked up at the mirror and saw Castiel standing there.

{Chapter End}


	4. Chapter 4

Time moved in slow motion; Dean bent over looking in the mirror seeing Cas standing with his head cocked slightly to the side, staring at Dean's satin and lace clad ass. Everything sped up as Dean stood up and turned towards the angel.

"What the _hell _areyou doing here, Cas?!" Dean's voice quiet yet furious.

There was that odd almost smirk on Castiel's face as he answered, "I wanted to inform you of what Bobby found on the goddess Isis. Did I come at a bad time?"

He was so genuine in his naïveté that it threw Dean off his game. "Does this look like a good time?" his voice thick with sarcasm.

"By your lack of clothing, I assume not," his blue eyes penetrating Dean's shields. He felt a blush cover his cheeks (why the hell was he blushing?), noticing how close Cas was standing. The confidence Dean had felt was slowly draining away in the presence of someone else, especially Castiel... feeling very exposed.

"Cas... I need to get dressed."

"Of course. I'll wait," the dark-haired angel said while awkwardly sitting on the built in bench.

"That's not what I- you know what, never mind," Dean grabbed all of his possessions. "Just zap me back to the motel."

The angel stood from the bench, already extremely close to Dean, yet stepped closer until their chests were nearly touching. Castiel's breathing was calm and even, while Dean's was becoming erratic and shallow; his heartbeat fluttering wildly in his chest. With a tilt of his head, Cas observed the increase in Dean's heart rate. In slight hesitation, brought his fingertips to Dean's forehead.

There was the familiar feeling of weightlessness as the angel's power transported Dean from place to place. He could hear or feel nothing for a brief moment, his limbs feeling like they stretched like a rubber band. When reached the ground, smashing into it like a bag of bricks. For several seconds, his bones felt like jelly until he felt his body become solid again. A wall of sounds flooded Dean's senses as he surveyed his surroundings. The familiar motel, two beds, now made and turned down, the solitary table and two chairs across the room, burgundy carpet (scratchy on his feet compared to the carpet in the dressing room),and the usual items one would find in a motel. The only unusual things were the angel and the cursed man, standing awkwardly in front of each other with Cas still touching Dean's freckled forehead.

Looking down, Dean gathered an armful of clothes and took them into the bathroom, talking loudly through the door. "You said you got news on Isis?" He held up a pair of black pants in front of him, realizing he'd bought skinny jeans without noticing. "Ah crap," the man mumbled as he shimmied the tight jeans over his feminine legs and hips, feeling quite restricted. He awkwardly readjusted his breasts in the dark purple bra, unsure of how it was supposed to feel, though all of it was unnatural. Dean couldn't help but feel how soft the grey t-shirt was before he put it on, fitting nicely to his gentle curves. With a green and blue plaid shirt in hand, he stepped out to see Castiel standing in the exact same spot.

"Yes. It seems that there is a way to summon her, but the ritual is dependent on the waxing and the waning of the moon."

Dean slipped on the plaid shirt, rolling the sleeves to his elbows in a few quick motions. "Meaning?" he walked past the angel and plopped down on the bed, his hands behind his head.

"It could be some time before we can perform the ritual. Bobby was still translating when I left," Cas turning around towards the beds, looking down at Dean's lying figure.

"So it could be a few weeks?" asked the green eyed man, trying his best to keep his voice calm but failing miserably. A thought suddenly hit Dean. "Hey wait," he sat up quickly, "can't you just use your holy powers or whatever to zap me back to normal?" His voice was hopeful, like a child on Christmas Eve.

"I could attempt to, but I doubt it would result in anything," Cas walked to the bed and sat on the edge next to Dean.

"Could you at least _sound _hopeful?" the light haired man asked with an edge to his voice.

"Oh, right. I'm sure... I can fix... this in no... time," the angel's words coming out oddly spaced and awkward.

"Actually, forget it. That's creepier than the surly robot bit," containing a laugh at how unfortunately awkward Castiel was.

"You may want to lie back."

"Why? Is it gonna hurt?" Dean asked, suddenly worried. He listened, though, rigidly lying back on the pillow.

Cas's voice deep as always, "I'm unsure. It could possibly be very excruciating. Try to relax."

"Oh. Yeah. Sure." Dean's tone layered thick with sarcasm as he squeezed his eyes shut. Castiel placed two fingertips on his charge's forehead and watched Dean's scrunched face relax. A soft electric current was coursing through Dean's body, leaving a warming sensation right behind it; going back and forth from the electric tingling to the spreading warmth. After a few minutes, Dean was completely relaxed, borderline falling asleep. The good feelings slowly receded back up into his forehead as Cas took his hand away, leaving Dean somewhat disappointed.

"I apologize, Dean. I was unable to lift your curse. Isis must have anticipated an outside source interfering. However, I was able to read the mark she left on you and confirm it was indeed Isis," the angel's voice sounding truly regretful.

"No big deal, so I guess we just have to wait for Bobby?" Dean asked, still feeling peaceful.

"It would appear so. He told me to leave because he couldn't work with me 'lurking over him.' Then he said he would call when he was finished. So I suppose all we can do is wait."

Dean let out a small laugh at the lurking comment, hearing it in Bobby's voice. The angel looked down at him and smiled back at Dean, although he was unsure of what caused him to smile. "We could go see... what was her name? Draves... Amanda Draves, that's right. Maybe she knows the ritual."

"She's not in town anymore, I already searched for her when Sam told me what happened," the smile fading to a neutral line as he spoke.

"Wait!" With a shout, Dean sat up, "You're telling me she skipped town?"

After a long pause, Castiel answered, "...Yes."

"That means Isis had to have warned her, right? She's hiding something. We've got to find her right now. First, you gotta pop Sam and Baby back here," his voice becoming fast.

"I think you should rest until morning. You will do no good when you're exhausted," Cas looked out at the half open curtains on the lone window, seeing the darkened sky outside then back to Dean.

"What're you talking about? I'm wide aw-" the angel gently touched Dean's forehead, putting him immediately to sleep. Cas laid Dean back onto the pillow instead of letting him flop down carelessly.

••••••

The little grey room was cramped with a matching grey desk and chairs, the wall lined with filing cabinets. Sam sat in a little chair, almost too small to hold his giant moose body. His legs were cramped uncomfortably against the metal desk and he would give anything to strangle his older brother at that moment. "I told you, that girl is my older sister," Sam said rolling his eyes as the mall security officer sitting at the other side of the desk.

"I don't see a resemblance," the man said with a laugh. "But if she is, mind explaining how she shoplifted over ten items from Victoria Secret?"

Sam leaned back in the chair, "What, seriously? Damn it, Dean."

"Dean?" the man's eyebrows raised.

"Deanna," Sam corrected with a frown, waiting for the man's coffee to kick in and leave Sam able to escape. On qui, the security officer stood from his chair and stretched.

"I'll be right back, don't go anywhere, Mr. Greyson," unaware Sam had given an alias. He bustled out the room and shut the door behind him.

Cas was next to Sam in no time, "Dean sent me," touching Sam and abruptly zapping him to the motel. It took a moment for Sam to realize what had just happened, looking around the room. He settled his gaze on the sleeping form of his brother, becoming angry at the sight of him. Before he could yell at him, Castiel stopped him.

"He's sleeping," Cas stated matter-of-factually.

"I see that," Sam said as if talking to a child. "I don't care. I was stuck waiting for some guy to go to the bathroom after four cups of coffee."

"You should express your anger when Dean is awake. It may not be obvious, but Dean's body is in shock. I didn't realize it until he asked me to make him male," the angel explained.

"So you're saying he just needs rest?" the younger brother asked, sitting on his own bed.

"If only it was that simple. Your brother has undergone a drastic change in a single day. The hormones in his body are fighting with each other and the curse is very slowly feeding off his energy in order to keep his body female. Long enough exposure to this curse could cause permanent damage, besides the gender change," Cas broke eye contact from Sam and looked over to Dean's sleeping form. He looked peaceful, his hair spread out over the pillow, snoring quietly on his side. As if knowing he was being watched, he rolled over to face the wall and clutched the blanket Castiel had placed on him before he had left for Sam.

The younger brother looked over to Dean, too then back to the angel. "Could this...?"

"Kill him?" Cas finished Sam's question. "Potentially, if left unattended. For now, Dean must rest to keep any damage at bay."

"Does he know?" Sam's voice full of worry, all traces of anger vanished immediately as he kept looking over to his brother.

The angel sighed deeply, "Not yet. I'm... not sure how I would tell Dean." Sam noticed Cas's voice was almost human in his inability to know what to do.

Brushing his hair behind his ears, Sam looked back and forth between Cas and Dean, the fear of losing his brother setting in. "We'll find her and when we do, I'm going to kill her," his voice low and intimidating.

{Chapter End}


	5. Chapter 5

Light streamed in through the window, landing directly on Dean's sleeping face. His eyes were scrunched shut against the brightness until he could no longer lie there. "Sam," he groaned, rolling over. His bra constricted his breathing and the tight pants felt rigid and confining.

"Your brother left fifteen minutes ago to run," Castiel's voice said from across the room. Dean sat up and saw the empty bed next to his, and Cas sitting in front of the open laptop. Using his index finger, he typed on the keyboard a single letter at a time.

"What are you doing?" Dean asked standing out of bed, wobbling towards the bathroom.  
Cas was smiling brightly to himself as he stared at the screen, "Sam told me to entertain myself while he was gone. He showed me how to use his laptop after he put a 'parental lock' on it."

Dean brushed his teeth in the bathroom and looked at his tangled hair, sighing deeply at the knots. With a mouth full toothpaste, he asked "What're you looking at?"

"Let me show you. It is the most amusing thing I have ever seen," the angel said.

Dean rinsed his mouth with water and walked over to Castiel, "Let's see it." Cas clicked 'play' on a video, a cat appearing with a blue shirt in front of a keyboard. The cat began to stiffly tap the keys with his paws as an upbeat song played in the background.

"Cats can't play an instrument," the angel said with a smile. "That's why it's funny."

Looking down with a blank expression, Dean slowly shook his head and walked back into the bathroom to retrieve the loathsome hairbrush. "We need to get you a date."

Suddenly serious, "I am the angel of Thursday. That is my date."

Attempting to brush through his honey brown hair patiently, Dean let out a laugh. "Never mind," he spoke to himself, "I need to see if I have any looser pants." After battling with his hair until it was smooth, he looked through the bag of clothes and found a grey 'bellbottom' jean. "This'll work." He left the angel smiling at the computer and shut the bathroom door behind him.

Easily, he unbuttoned and unzipped his pants, worked them down his hips and thighs... then ran into trouble. The skinny jeans clung tightly to his knees and calves, as much as Dean struggled, and boy did he struggle. "Do I have to cut these off?" tugging furiously at the material. After a few minutes of failure, he pulled his pants back up and stepped back into the room. Dean grabbed a normal knife from his bag and sat on his bed.

Looking up, Cas asked "What are you doing, Dean?"

"I can't get these friggen pants off, I'll just have to cut 'em off," preparing to slice the fabric.

"Wait, I could assist you," the dark haired angel said, standing and walking across the room.

"I dunno... seems kind of weird," Dean's voice hesitant. Castiel stood over him, his blue eyes holding some kind of unreadable emotion in them. A slight warm blush slowly crept up Dean's cheeks as Cas moved closer.

"Here," Cas reached down and grabbed onto the belt loops on Dean's hips, looking into his eyes. He pulled down the material to reveal the dark purple satin underwear with a lace trim on top.

"I've got this part!" Dean exclaimed loudly while he pushed Castiel's hands away. "Just get the feet," his face turning rapidly redder, and felt a warmth spreading through his body in a familiar way, feeling the blood rush to in between his legs. It was foreign, yet at the same time very natural. He'd felt it similarly when he had a male body, but now it was intensified in the body he was currently in. He lied back on the bed and lifted a leg to Cas's waist height, turning his face to the side while still looking at Castiel as the angel grabbed onto the material and pulled it off, leaving Dean's smooth leg exposed. Gently, Cas put Dean's leg back down and grabbed the other one, easily pulling the fabric away. The angel only broke eye contact to look at Dean's chest, heavily moving up and down with his hitched breathing.

A whirlwind of thoughts were racing through Dean's mind, unable to piece it altogether. Seconds felt like hours as the two looked at each other, both very confused yet very clear headed. It was getting harder to think with his heart beating so loudly in his ears, drowning out any background noise. "Cas?" Dean's voice soft and breathy as he propped himself up on his elbows.  
The last voice he wanted to hear as the motel door swung open, "Dean, I bought you some-WHAT THE HELL?" Sam shouted while nearly dropping the coffee he was holding. He stood at the door, sweating profusely from his run and looked in between his brother and the angel. Taking in the situation (his brother in a woman's body laying back on the bed, pantless and blushing and Castiel still holding onto the pants), Sam wasn't sure what to do.  
Dean scrambled to the bathroom and hastily threw on the grey jeans, Cas still standing in place. "It's not what it looks like," the older brother began to defensively say, buttoning and zipping his pants. "I couldn't get the skinny jeans off and Cas offered to help," his voice in a rush as he stepped back into the room.

Sam shook his head and held out the coffee to Dean, looking at Castiel's blank face. He couldn't contain his chuckle, "Whatever Dean. Next time, just put a sock on the door." His voice teasing as he went into the bathroom.

"It wasn't like that!" Dean becoming flustered; only making Sam laugh harder through the bathroom door. However, Dean couldn't bring himself to look directly at Cas, the blush still thick on his cheeks. Castiel went and sat back down, looking back to the computer but all traces of a smile gone.  
Dean took a large swig of the black coffee, burning his mouth but not caring or tasting it. From the corner of his eye, he kept glancing over to the unmoving angel, thinking through what just happened. Why did he react like that? Had this curse changed him that deeply, not just in his body but in his sexuality? Dean quickly pushed the thought out and sipped the scalding coffee.

As soon as Sam stepped out of the bathroom, Dean was about to start defending himself again (even though the subject had been dropped) but was interrupted by Sam's phone ringing loudly. He pulled it out of his jacket pocket. "Hey. Yeah," everyone in the room waiting for answers. "Should we go out there? Okay. Thanks Bobby," he ended the call and looked to Dean. "Bobby's done translating the texts; says we have to wait for another new moon to perform the ritual," his voice solemn.

"Wait... didn't we just have one of those?" Dean asked.

"Yep," the younger brother answered curtly. "A few days ago, when all of the women got pregnant."

"So basically... we have to wait a whole month?" the thought really sinking in. Dean was guaranteed at least a month of being a woman, still unaware of how dangerous the curse could be for that length of time.

"Yeah," Sam answered, pointedly looking at Castiel, the both of them knowing how this could end.  
The older brother fluffed his long hair with his hand and shrugged his shoulders. "Not that big of a deal, right? No use crying over spilt milk. Does Bobby want us to go to his place?"

"Just until we figure out a way to gank Isis," answered the younger brother as he began to pack their belongings.  
Castiel finally spoke, "I'll take you there now."

"No no no. I really just want to sit behind the wheel and enjoy the one good thing I have," said Dean.

"We shouldn't waste time," the angel said, trying to hint at the severity of their situation. Sam could only stay silent, everyone looking towards Dean.

"Come on, it's only a state over. What're y'all looking at?" Dean asked suspiciously. The room was silent. "Whatever. I'm driving there. You guys can pop there, I don't care. I just want some time with Baby."

The younger brother sighed heavily. "Alright Dean. We'll drive," giving in. When Dean turned his back to begin packing his belongings in his standard army bag, Cas glared at the tall brother for surrendering. All Sam could do was shrug his shoulders and continue packing.

There was a tension between the three men(woman) as Dean drove over the back country roads, Sam in the passenger seat and Castiel in the back. At first, they'd laughed at Dean because he had to scoot the seat forward to compensate for his lost height, but once out on the open road it became apparent that Dean was missing a piece of the story. The older brother ignored the tension and instead focused on the loud purr of the engine, the way the sun glinted off the hood, how the steering wheel felt under his hands. It felt nice to be able to control something, to know how the Impala would react every second of the drive.

They stopped for a quick bite to eat and to buy a bottle of whiskey as a thank you present to Bobby. Translating wasn't easy, the Winchesters understood that and they knew without him, they would be royally screwed.

Once they reached Bobby's they left everything in the car to first greet their surrogate father. Cas stood to the side as Sam gave the bearded man a quick hug. "Hey Bobby. Thanks for translating."

Bobby quickly shrugged his shoulders, "Least I could do." When he caught sight Dean, he let out a breath and stared at him for a second. "Wow, they weren't kidding." Dean looked down in embarrassment. "Don't be like that, c'mere," Bobby pulled Dean into a manly hug like they usually did and released him.

"Good to see you Bobby," Dean said, heading back to the car for his bag.

"Even if you are a girl, we're still going to make you do as much work," Bobby quipped with a smile. Sam laughed heartily as he grabbed his own bag from the trunk.

"Bite me," Dean retaliated, jokingly shoving the whiskey bottle in Bobby's arms.

Inside, things were playful until Cas finally spoke out, "What is required for the summoning ritual?"

Immediately, everyone went into hunter mode. "Says here," Bobby pointed to the text on the desk in front of him, "that on the new moon, we'll need to carve her name in hieroglyphics in the earth, chant a little something, melt some wax..." he took a drink from his nearly empty glass, "and viola."

"That's it?" Dean asked, looking over Bobby's shoulder at the book, unable to read it.

"Looks to be that way. Still trying to find out how to kill her," he answered. "I think the trick is that you can only do this ritual once a month."

Sam raised his eyebrows, "Makes sense, I guess. Now we just gotta find a way to gank her."

A flutter of wings and Castiel had abruptly left the room. "Whoa, what's his problem?" Bobby asked Dean.

The older brother shrugged, his mind wandering back to earlier that day when Cas had helped him remove his pants, but on the surface acting like nothing happened. "Dunno. He's been weird all day."

Sam stayed quiet, wanting to tell Dean the truth but unsure of how. "Hey, I'm gonna run to the store. Need anything?"

"I'm good," Bobby pointed to the opened bottle of whiskey.

"Yeah, you know what I want," Dean said with a smile.

"Pie. Got it. I'll be back in a bit," the younger brother said in a hurry as he bolted out the door. After adjusting the seats in the Impala, Sam prayed to Castiel. Next to him, appeared the angel. "Cas, we need to talk."  
{Chapter End}


	6. Chapter 6

"So tell me," Bobby said while pouring whiskey for Dean, "what's it like?"

"To be a woman?" Dean asked, although knowing the answer.

"Well of course ya idjit," sitting back down in his chair.

"It's... uncomfortable," Dean answered lamely.

"That's it?"

"It's a general kind of thing. Long hair, being shorter, bras, it's all very... crappy," the younger man avoiding the fact that his skin was softer, how quickly is body reacted to touch... the way he was forming feelings.

"My condolences. Can't be all bad, though?" Bobby asked while leaning back in his chair.

"Doesn't matter. I'm stuck like this for the month, might as well get used to it," Dean gulped down the last of his drink, watching the sun set outside.

"Could be worse, you know. At least you know who you are," Bobby tried to console but it meant very little to Dean.

"I get that. Like I said, it doesn't matter. I wonder where's Sam? He's be gone a pretty long time for just a supply run." As he was finished speaking, he saw Sam come in with several grocery bags. "Speak of the devil!"

"Here you go," Sam handed Dean a bag with two pies in it, black cherry and apple. The younger brother sat the rest of the grocery bags on the counter in the kitchen, not bothering to unpack them just yet.

"Thanks Sammy," Dean said with a bright and genuine smile.

Sam walked over to his brother and gently patted him on the shoulder, "Not a problem."

"So Deanna," Bobby began to say, causing Dean to glare at him, "I think we should braid your hair."

Dean folded his arms across his chest and stuck out his bottom jaw. "Bobby, I can make your death look like an accident."

Sam and Bobby busted out laughing. "Aw, is it that time of the month?" The bearded man asked while slapping his knee in laughter.

"Haha. Get it out now. Got any else?" Dean asked sarcastically.

"Cramps makin' you cranky?" Bobby joked. "Need some Midol?" Bobby and Sam now barely able to contain their explosive laughter.

"Y'all done?" Dean had a tense smile as he tapped his foot.

The laughter died down a bit, Bobby even wiped a tear away as the room got quiet. "Woo boy. Yeah, I'm done for now."

"Good. I'll be in the shower," the green eyed man said while getting off the couch. He walked briskly out of the room and to the guest bathroom.

"Aw c'mon, Dean. We didn't hurt your feelings, did we?" Bobby called after Dean.

"Nope," Dean yelled to the other room, shutting the bathroom door. It took a few minutes for the pipes to heat up, allowing him time to start undressing and brushing his hair while the water ran. He had never realized how much of an inconvenience long hair was, and he thought about the possibility of having it cut to a more manageable length. Steam began to fill the room, signaling Dean that the shower was ready.  
Meanwhile, Sam talked to Bobby. "Maybe," he cleared his throat, "maybe we should go easy on Dean?"

"I know, but how many chances will we get to pick on him like that?" Bobby answered with a smile. The words were a double edged sword to Sam, his brother's well being weighing heavily in his mind. He thought back to the conversation he had with Castiel.

"_Cas, we need to talk," Sam put the car in reverse and began to drive to the store down the deserted road._

_"What is it you want to talk about, Sam?" the angel seeming preoccupied._

_"Um... I don't know, maybe we should talk about Dean," Sam's voice sarcastic._

_Castiel let out a sigh and looked out the passenger window. "I don't know what I could tell you. There's nothing else we can do at this point."_

_Sam nearly slammed on the brakes as he looked over at the dark haired angel. "What the hell Cas! We're talking about his life, why do you sound like you don't even care?"_

_"You don't understand-" Castiel was cut off by Sam._

_"No! You don't understand. Dean could be dying and you act like there's nothing wrong!" Sam's anger flaring wildly, beginning to increase his speed._

_"Sam," the angel's voice warning. He took a deep breathe and let it out slowly. "You know not which you speak of."_

_"Don't pull that crap on me, Cas," Sam snapped._

_"No, you listen to me Sam," the angel's voice commanding. "I am in the middle of something important-"_

_"More important than Dean?!"_

_"Sam," the warning voice again._

_"Just don't. I'll figure this out on my own. Dean and I always figured it out before you came along and we can do it now."_

_"What are you saying?" the angel's voice actually sounding hurt, but it didn't hurt Sam's resolve._

_"Until you wanna help Dean, don't come around," Sam's voice harsh but all he wanted to do was protect his brother._

_"If that's what you feel is necessary," and with a flutter if wings, Sam was left alone in the car._

_"_Dean, how much longer are you gonna take?" the younger brother knocked loudly on the bathroom door.

"I'm moving as fast as I can. So much... hair." Dean called out while still in the shower.

Letting out a genuinely happy laugh, Sam went back to sit with Bobby. "Thankfully your water heater is industrial sized."

"Is he getting used to the new hair?" Bobby chuckled into his whiskey glass.

"It'll take some time. So I was wondering if I could look through some of your books?"

"Of course, any idea what you're looking for?" Bobby asked.

"Uh, just simple spells and incantations. Want to be prepared for anything," answered the tall man.

"Hmmm," Bobby said while he thought. "You should check the basement. I've got a truckload down there."

"Thanks Bobby," Sam said while hopping down to the basement. Down the stairs, he looked at the large stack of books. He grabbed a small armful of hardcover books of all different shapes and sizes. Bounding up the stairs two at a time, Sam plopped down on the couch, moving the pies to the desk and making room for the pile of books.

"You'll always be a nerd," Dean said, shaking a towel through his hair. He wore one of his old olive green shirts and black boxer briefs (they make for great sleep wear, even if they are too big).

Sam smiled, "You'll thank me someday," already looking through a red leather bound book.

The older brother let out a laugh and tousled his hair like he saw in the movies. "I'm gonna go charge all my phones. I'll be back down in a bit." Dean went up the stairs in his bare feet, the wooden floors familiar to the touch. He opened the door to the "guest" room (basically the Sam and Dean room), and stopped dead in his tracks.

"Cas?"

The angel sat on one of the twin beds, his hands laced together, his face unreadable.

"Everything okay, buddy?" Dean took a step forward, quietly shutting the door behind him and dropping the towel down.

Castiel finally looked up at his charge, noticing the shirt was askew and his shoulder was nearly poking out. He clenched his hands into fists. "Dean... I..." It seemed so odd, so _human._

_"_Cas, you gotta talk to me," the green eyed man's voice soft. The angel stood quietly and closed the distance between himself and his charge. Standing in front of Dean, it was odd to be taller than him, the angle emphasizing his long eyelashes and naturally pouty lips. The two were quiet while looking at each other, reading their expressions, looking past all facades. In Dean's mind, he was becoming more and more confused about his feelings. Had this always been present? The way his breath would hitch when Castiel was close, the way Dean bit his lip when waiting for the angel to speak...

That was when Dean knew, these things had always been there, but damn it did Dean always push it away. There was always that line he couldn't cross... in no way was he homophobic, but it was hard for Dean to let go of the idea of a "manly man." Finally though, the line could be crossed. He didn't stop to think about the consequences or how when/if his gender changed back and what obstacles that would bring. His erratic heartbeat quickened even further. Standing on his toes, Dean leaned up the few extra inches between them and gently placed his lips against Cas's. The angel responded with the hesitancy of his first kiss but relaxing quickly.

It was sweet and curious, Dean standing flat on his feet again, breaking their lips apart. Castiel looked mournfully to the side, his form going rigid. "Dean..." Suddenly, Dean became very self conscious and scared he had made the wrong decision. That Cas didn't reciprocate his feelings. The angel looked at Dean squarely, his eyes cold. He continued to speak, "I will be taking an absence for a while. I have business to attend to."

"Wait, what?" Dean reached out and grabbed onto Castiel's trench coat. Just as soon as he'd touched him, Dean's hands were now empty after he heard the usual sound of wings. "Cas? _Cas_?" the man asked frantically. But there was no sign of the angel anywhere.

{Chapter End}


	7. Chapter 7

It had been a week and a day of no news. Dean frequently prayed to his angel, hoping to hear something back... hoping Cas hadn't left forever. He tried to stay cheery after Castiel disappeared, eating two pies that night. During the day, he would practice his knife throwing skills on an old board outside while Sam and Bobby poured over books.

At night, Dean would hook a light to the hood of the Impala and would fiddle with the engine until he was exhausted (which was becoming more frequent). He would drag his feet inside and sit down next to Sam, occasionally make him lose his page. Besides the gender change, everything seemed relatively normal.  
Classic Dean, he bottled up his emotions and forced them out of his head, that was until he was lying in bed. Had he destroyed everything? So much for the profound bond they share, Dean thought while staring up at the ceiling. His younger brother was absent from the room, as he usually was this early at night. Every waking second, he was reading through stacks upon stacks of spell books, marking down what he found useful. There were several days he fell asleep with a book in his hand and the notepad next to him full of sporadic notes. Dean even tried to peek at them but couldn't understand what Sam was writing.  
While thinking about the day's events, Dean grabbed onto his braid (he had learned that putting his hair up in a pony tail or a braid made it much more manageable, no matter how much they teased him) and twirled it in his fingers. His chest was aching, but not like the way the rest of his joints did. He didn't want to think it was Castiel's absence, but in his mind, that is what causes the pain. In reality, Sam knew why Dean would occasionally clutch his chest. Dean's body was quickly burning through energy and not recuperating what was being used. The younger brother would often tell Dean to relax, go take a nap, but of course he never listened.

The next morning, "What, you got heartburn?" Bobby asked Dean, seeing the way he put his hand to his chest.

"Ah yeah," he lied quickly. "Got any pepto?"

"Boy, you know where it is," the old man answered looking back to his books.

"Right," Dean said standing from the couch and going to the bathroom. He didn't see his brother worriedly staring after him. In the bathroom, he leaned over the sink and splashed water on his face. The feminine face was familiar at this point, only occasionally shocking him. He straightened up and wiped his face dry on a hand towel.

Dean walked back into the room and cracked his knuckles. "Thanks Bobby."

"Yeah yeah. Go outside and play. I need to concentrate," he answered half joking.

Normally, Dean would retaliate, but it was only noon and he was too tired. He stepped outside and saw Baby, covered in dirt. "You could use a wash."  
Sam looked out the window to see his brother hosing down the Impala. It was good to see him taking care of Baby, it gave Sam hope. He looked back down to the book and read the same page over and over... joy slowly filling him.

The tall man jumped off the couch, book still in hand, and ran out to Dean. Bobby left, staring at the empty couch and then going back to his book.  
Outside, Dean saw his moose of a brother charge towards him. "Dean! I found it!"

"Found what?" the older brother asked confused, turning off the hose and staring at Sam.

Sam looked down at the book and recited, "Virtus voco in me virtus voco in me amorem in me fero.  
Dem vim meam do vobis animus dabo tibi ubera mea," then placed his hand on Dean's shoulder. A swirl of green light came from Sam's hand and pushed down into Dean, disappearing under his skin.

The grin on Sam's face could only be paralleled by the confusion on Dean's. "It worked!" the younger brother yelled excitedly.

"_What _worked? What the hell did you just do, Sammy?!"

Sam let out an uncontrollable laugh, "Okay, let me expla-" he fell forward, face planting on the wet ground.

"Jesus, Sammy!" Dean crouched down and rolled his younger brother over. He was still breathing but instead of looking like he fainted, it was more like he fell asleep while standing up. "Bobby! Get out here!" Dean yelled as loud as he could.

The two hauled Sam's gigantic figure back into the house and dropped him down on the bed. "Where's an angel when you need one?" the old man said breathing heavily.

The words stung Dean. "No kidding. I grabbed the book," he opened it and studied the incantation on the page. "This. This is what he said," handing the book over to Bobby.

"Let me see..." he read over the text. "I have no idea what this is for. And he said it worked?"

"Yeah," Dean answered lamely, looking down at Sam's snoring face. "He seemed really happy about it. Do you have something that can wake him up?" Dean played with his ponytail, an increasing habit.

"If this was done by magic, all we can do is let him sleep it off. Don't want to risk it," Bobby said, grabbing a glass and swallowing down the mouthful of whiskey in it. "You want some?"

"Oh yeah," Dean pulled a second glass from a shelf and held it out, Bobby pouring it.

"Why're y'all so friggen weird?"

Dean drank the entire glass, feeling the effects already as it burned all the way down. "I've been asking the same thing for years."

••••••

It was well into night when Sam finally woke up. At first he was confused and then as if something clicked into place, he snapped up and wobbled quickly over to Dean, making his older brother jump.

"How are you feeling?" Sam asked.

"I should be asking you that. What the hell happened, Sammy?" Dean handed his brother an apple, knowing he hadn't eaten in quite some time.

After taking a few bites, Sam waved his hand and repeated his question, "How are you feeling?"

"Fine, I guess. Stop stalling and explain," Dean said, looking back to Bobby.

"So your chest doesn't hurt?" asked the younger brother, grinning ear to ear.

"N-no. Alright Sammy," even as a woman, Dean could still be intimidating, "start talking."

"Let's go outside," Sam hopped off the couch and ran outside.

Bobby and Dean sat unmoving with wide eyes. "He's officially gone coo-coo for Coco Puffs," Bobby said.

Dean let out a sigh. "I'll go follow him." He stepped outside as found Sam standing nearby, waiting. "Will you start explaining?"

"Okay," the two began to walk as Sam spoke, "Dean, the curse Isis put on you is more than just a gender swap." While the older brother looked warily at Sam, he continued speaking, "The curse has been eating away at your energy to maintain the female body."

"Energy? You sound like hippy," that was all Dean could say, his mind spinning.

"It makes sense. The curse is powerful but not as powerful as it could be. It has to feed on you to keep going," he explained.

"I think I'm understanding... but you still have more to explain," Dean said while they kept walking at an even pace.

"Having the curse for too long, it would eventually run out of energy or whatever to keep you a woman."

"So I'd just go back to normal?" slightly hopeful sounding.

"Unfortunately no. Instead, it would begin to devour the one thing in your body made of pure energy," Sam stopped walking and turned to his brother.

"My soul?"

"Your soul would be eaten away by the curse. If it made it's way through that, then it would suck you dry on a cellular level, killing you," the younger brother put his hands in his pockets and waited for Dean's reaction.

"So... I could die?" his voice hard and unwavering. "How do you even know all this?"

"Yes, but I found a way to prolong it. That spell I did was giving you some of my energy. It'll keep the curse at bay while we try to get to Isis," Sam had a small shy smile.

"So wait, you've been looking for a spell like this the whole time?" asked Dean.

The younger brother, unsure of if this was good or bad answered hesitantly, "Yes."

Stepping towards his brother, Dean held out his arms and pulled Sam into a quick hug, "That's for helping me." Then he straightened up and slapped his brother on the cheek with a loud smack, "And that's for not telling me."

Looking a little shocked, Sam put his hand to his cheek but laughed softly. "I should've told you, I'm sorry," his tone sincerely apologetic.

"I could've helped you and how did you know that spell wasn't going to hurt you? You can't act on your own. We're a unit, we work together, Sammy."

"You're right... I just didn't want to give false hope. But you're still absolutely right. We're a team," Sam said, still smiling.

"No more secrets?" the green eyed man asked while turning back towards the house.

"No more secrets," Sam confirmed as they walked back towards the house.

"So tell me, how do you know all that?"

"When you asked Cas to change you back, he realized your curse was more than it seemed," Sam said, unsure of how his brother would react.

"So you and Cas knew the whole time?"

"Yeah," lamely.

"When were you going to tell me?" Dean asked.

"I wasn't sure. Cas didn't know how to tell you and it turned into a secret. I'm sorry Dean, we should've told you right away," he expected anger from his brother.

"You should've, but that's okay. Remember, we're partners. Next time I'm dying of a curse, would you please let me know?" Dean asked playfully.

"Sure thing," Sam answered, happy this turned out better than he had anticipated.

They'd walked back to the house, stepped inside to find a very confused Bobby. "Oh, and by the way, _you _get to explain this to Bobby," Dean said with a smile. It was a punishment for keeping secrets, both of them knowing Bobby would blow up for it. However, it was a very slight punishment. The older brother walked past the two and to his room (Sam was always sleeping on the couch now), hearing Sam talk to Bobby. When he was in his room, he quickly changed into a large t-shirt as boxers, climbing into bed. From the first floor, he heard the faint sounds of shouting making him chuckle to himself as he laid there.

"Cas... you knew about everything... and you still left?" Dean's voice sounding hurt as he prayed. He wanted to say so much more but couldn't bring himself to do it. He waited for some sign, anything to prove to him that he hadn't just been abandoned, but after what felt like hours with no answer Dean finally drifted off to sleep.

But the angel heard him clearly, thousands of miles away, and even without him speaking it, the rest was loud and clear. "_Cas... you knew about everything... and you still left? Do you just... not even care about me?"_

••••••

It was in his hands. At long last he had found it after searching nonstop; the book everyone coveted. He could felt it humming with power, giving him a rush.

"Castiel," a familiar voice stated from behind him.

Cas turned towards the angel woman and nodded. "Sarah." Her vessel, a young blond woman with short cropped hair, wearing a simple skirt suit.

"Hand it over," she commanded.

"I refuse," Castiel answered, his eyes narrowed.

Sarah began to pace back and forth in front of the dark haired angel. "Is this for the human?"

"That's none of your concern."

"Oh it isn't? You've killed your own kind, Castiel! All for a filthy human?" her voice was outraged and dripped with disgust.

"I merely protected myself. I tried to reason with every angel that came across me."

"Don't you think they were trying to reason with you? You have killed your own family because you're selfish."

"I'm selfish?" Castiel's voice throwing all disgust back toward her. "I know what spells you are after in this book. Spells that will ruin humanity."

"Ruin it? How can we ruin what is already trash? I'm warning you Castiel, give me the book or I will have to kill you," an angel blade slipping down from her sleeve and into her hand. Three other angels came out of the shadows and surrounded him.

"I understand," the dark haired angel said remorsefully. He threw the book to Sarah and grabbed onto his angel blade. As she caught it, Castiel lunged forward and stabbed her stomach. Light flooded the room as Cas held the book in one hand and the angel blade in the other. The three angels, all with blades poised for attack. "Don't make me do this, brothers."

"We'll take our chances," one said while the three of them closed in on Cas.

••••••

It had been several days since Dean last prayed to Cas. The night he found out about the fatality of the curse was the last time he spoke to the angel. He hoped to hear something back that night, and when he didn't... he thought Cas had given up on him, didn't want to see him after the kiss.

Sam began to notice his brother drifting off now and then, his face blank but his hands clenched and his body tense. Bobby was seeing it too, but neither of them knew how to approach it. They wanted to wait for Dean to come to them, but he was so emotionally constipated, it seemed like it would never happen.

"Dean?" Sam's voice soft as he put a hand on his brother's shoulder.

"Hmmm?" Dean's green eyes looking into Sam's.

"You spaced off there."

"I do that some times. Anyway, let's watch a movie or something while we research," the older brother suggested.

"You mean while _I _do research?" Sam corrected. "Anyway, I have the perfect movie picked out. It's just for you, Dean."

The green eyed man sighed, "What is it?"

"You'll see," Sam answered.

The three men sat on the couch, Dean still in his pink dress and heels, as the movie started. Sam was looking through news on his laptop, Bobby at an old yellow book, and Dean flipping through random spells. As the opening for _Pretty In Pink_, Bobby cracked up while Sam had a devious smile.

"Oh, ha-ha."

Once the movie was over, the three of them stayed put on the couch, studying extensively over the material in front of them.

"Bobby, you make any headway on ganking Isis?" the older brother asked while rubbing his temple.

"Not yet. I hate to say it, but my texts don't go back far enough. At least not my Egyptian books. We may be SOL on this one," the bearded man sighed and leaned his head back for a moment.

Dean's question directed towards his brother, "Any sightings of her?"

"Not one" answered Sam. "We might just have to talk to her when she's summoned."

"God, I hope not. She was a real bitch," Dean groaned loudly.

Several hours later, the sun had set for a while and everyone was feeling a bit drowsy (or was it the bourbon). Sam fell asleep on the couch, Bobby threw a blanket over him and shut down his laptop, heading to his own room on the first floor.

Dean walked up the stairs and into his dark room, the only light coming from the moon brightly lit outside the window. While he was alone, so many thoughts crushed him. Sam giving his energy as a supplement was only a temporary fix, Dean could tell by the way he felt constantly tired. He didn't have the heart to tell his brother, because it was better, but he could see it would only progress. It was hard not to dwell on the thought of this being forever, however short it may be. They couldn't find a way to kill Isis and they had nothing to negotiate with. Things were looking worse and worse as the days went by, but Dean wanted to seem as normal as possible, for his younger brother.

The floorboards creaked softly as Dean made his way over to the bed, shedding most of his clothes, leaving the underwear on. The freedom of being braless was unexplainable to anyone who hadn't worn a bra. He threw on his favorite black ACDC shirt, huge on him in this feminine body. Dean slumped into the bed, the sheets feeling soft against his smooth skin (he had discovered shaving his legs that morning). The whole house smelled like Old Spice, so pleasant and comforting as Dean brought the covers up to his ears.

Cas stood next to the bed, invisible. The angel looked down at his charge, sleeping peacefully. He was overwhelmed by conflicting thoughts as he watched Dean sleep, scared of the war battling inside him. Castiel stood in that spot for hours until finally, he reached out and brushed a lock of hair out of Dean's face. The contact forced the man out of sleep, and electrical pulse coursing through him as he sat up. "Cas?" his voice hopeful.

In that moment, Castiel made his decision. Becoming visible, he sat on the bed. "I'm here, Dean."

{Chapter End}


	8. Chapter 8

"I'm here, Dean."

A rush of emotions swarmed Dean as he saw the angel and heard the gentle tone to his voice. He acted without thinking, wrapping his arms around Castiel's neck and pulling him under the comforter. "You're here," Dean repeated quietly, shocked yet happy at the same time.

The angel bit his lip, as Dean smoothed down a bit of Cas's hair. He lifted his hand and placed it over Dean's, letting his body do as it wanted. Castiel wanted to explain everything, but he couldn't find the words for it. Maybe it was muscle memory from Jimmy Novak's body or maybe he didn't have to overthink things with Dean now that he had decided, either way it didn't matter. The dark haired angel took his hand away from Dean's and put it softly over his waist, pulling him to Castiel's chest.

Dean continued to run his fingers through the angel's short black hair, the sensation causing goose bumps to rise on Cas's skin. He closed his eyes to the touch. The green eyed man took this time to study Castiel's features, his eyes wandering over him and landing on his pink lips. Leaning forward, Dean pressed his lips to the angel's. It was sweet and soft like their first kiss, an electric current between where they touched.

When Dean pulled away, he leaned his forehead against the angel's, both of their eyes now open. They were silent, but they were saying so much in their actions. When Dean traced his thumb over Cas's neck, he was saying _I'm sorry for doubting you._ The way Castiel wrapped his arms around his charge said_ I'm sorry for leaving you when you needed m_e... and when Cas kissed Dean's forehead, he was saying_ I __**do**__ care about you._

The two were both emotionally stunted, yet they still managed to communicate. Dean had so many questions about where he had been, why he had left, and why he was back, but those could wait for later. They had already told each other the most important things before Dean drifted off to sleep.

The angel watched over him the whole night, at first in the moonlight then in the sun rays. Sunshine had filled the room by the time Dean woke up, groggy and trying to remember if he had been dreaming or it was all real. He opened his eyes to see the shocking blue of Castiel's eyes, smiling softly.

"Good morning, Dean," his voice low and gravelly like it always was.

"You stayed," the green eyed man said joyfully, ignoring the deep pain in his chest.

"Did you sleep well?" asked the angel, surveying Dean's very messy hair.

With a smile, he answered, "Best I have in weeks."

"Then why do you appear to me more tired today than you were yesterday?"

His charge rolled his eyes and sat up, cracking his back and rolling his aching shoulder. "Did you lay in bed with your trench coat all night?" Dean asked with a laugh.

"I didn't want to move or disturb you while you slept," Cas sitting up, his feet touching the floor, but his upper body still angled towards his charge.

"Yeah, buddy... we're going to have to talk about what you do when I'm sleeping. It's kinda creepy for you to watch me all night," Dean explained while standing up. He stretched his limbs and let out a satisfied groan as he began to fully wake up.

"But I've done it before. I don't see how it's 'creepy,'" explained the dark haired angel.

"Wait, how often have you watched me sleep?" asked Dean as he searched for clean clothes in his bag, his back to the angel.

"Whenever I haven't been on a mission or otherwise busy. I watch over you and your brother frequently," Castiel looked at Dean bending over in front of him and cleared his throat quietly. The green eyed man found what he was looking for and stood upright.

"Cas that's pretty friggen weird, sweet but-" Dean turned towards the angel sitting on the bed. "Were you just... checking me out?"

Castiel said quickly, "What? No, maybe." Dean raised his eyebrow and just stared at Cas, the way he did to his younger brother when he wanted answers. "...yes. I admit that I... find you... attractive," the angel's voice quieting as he spoke.

"Oh you do?" Dean asked, dropping the clothes in his hand and closing the space between himself and the angel. In this moment, he felt infinitely confident as he straddled Castiel's lap. With widened eyes, Cas swallowed deeply, his gaze being held by Dean's. The green eyed man grabbed the angel's blue tie, pulling him closer.

"Yes," Cas answered, his breathing shaky, surprising and exciting Dean. He couldn't help but notice the bulge against his thigh from under Castiel's suit.

Dean let go of the tie to instead gently grab the angel's dark hair on the back of his head. "Good." He pulled him into a deep kiss, very different than the ones before. They were both filled with deep desire, threatening to claw it's way out of them. Cas, at first was unsure of what to do, but as soon as he let his desires take over, there was no turning back. Castiel's hands gripped Dean's hips as they deepened the kiss.

Dean, showing Cas the ropes, opened his mouth in the kiss and gently coaxed the angel's to do the same with his tongue. Rubbing his hands down his neck and to his shoulders, Dean began to take off the angel's coat and remove his backwards tie. Cas worked his way under Dean's t-shirt, the angel's hands now on the bare skin of Dean's waist, very slowly moving upward. Both of their hearts beat wildly, Dean pulling back to see Castiel's flushed cheeks, his lips more pink than usual.

"That was... very pleasant," the angel said, breathing heavily as his hands rested back on Dean's hips.

His charge's green eyes flashed with a confident gleam, "You think we're done?" A bright and devious grin on Dean's face as he pushed Castiel's back to the bed, bringing his lips down to the angel's neck. At first he left short kisses up and down Cas's neck, then softly biting once. Castiel ran his hands over his charge's back, feeling the smooth (besides scars) skin under his fingertips. Loving this reaction, Dean left a trail of kisses up to the angel's earlobe, gently sucking and biting the soft skin.

Castiel's hips bucked involuntarily up against the green eyed man as he moaned, "Dean."

Over the sound of each other's breathing, they heard quick footsteps up the wooden stairs. Dean quickly jumped off of Cas, as he heard the familiar voice of his brother outside the room. "Dean, you up?"

"Yeah! I'll be down a second, just gotta get dressed," thankful that Sam didn't burst into the room.

"Well hurry up, you're gonna want to see this," Sam's voice excited as he went back down the stairs.

"We can't tell him about this," Dean whispered to the angel as he grabbed the clean clothes off the floor.

"Why?" Cas asked innocently.

"Look the other way," Dean instructed as he faced away from Castiel and threw his shirt off. The angel obeyed as Dean quickly got undressed and then redressed. "Because it'll be weird," he explained.

"I don't understand," the angel said uncertainly. While Dean was facing away, he had fixed his tie and trench coat back into the normal spot.

Dean quickly ran a brush through his messy hair and put it up in a simple ponytail. "Look, please just do this for me?"

Castiel, unsure of why, still agreed to not tell anyone. "If you say so. I'll be downstairs," and he was gone.

Dean took a few calming breaths and went down to the first floor. "Cas, did you bring this?" he heard Sam ask. When Dean rounded the corner, he saw Bobby pouring over a large metal bound book, Cas standing in the middle of the floor and Sam, taking a step towards the angel.

"Yes," Castiel answered plainly, his eyes flashing to Dean and then back to the younger brother.

"What's going on?" the older brother asked, going further into the room.

"We found this book on Bobby's desk, and apparently Cas brought it," Sam explained.

"Is this...?" the bearded man asked in awe.

"You are not mistaken. It is the Book of the Dead," the angel said.

"How the hell did you find this?!" Bobby asked, flipping through the pages.

"Whoa whoa whoa, what does this mean?" Dean asked the angel.

Bobby answered, quiet but heard by the entire room, "It means we can gank Isis."

"Is that what you meant... when you said you had business?" Sam asked, his voice low.

The angel looked to Sam, a flicker of anger in his eye, "It is."

"Why didn't tell me?" the younger brother asked, feeling guilty for shunning Cas.

"I tried, but you wouldn't listen. Instead of arguing with you, I felt my time was better spent searching."

Dean, confused by the conversation, stepped in between the two, "Cas, what's he talking about?"

"Sam told me to stay away unless I was helping," the angel mildly irritated.

The younger brother quickly stepped in, "Don't make it sound like that. You said there was nothing else we could do!" His temper flared as he spoke.

"Yes, I said _we. _You didn't wait for me to finish talking before you dismissed me. Had you been patient, I would have informed you I was searching for a means to kill Isis."

"Wait. Sammy, did you send Cas away?" the older brother asked, a hurt edge in his voice that he hoped no one would notice.

"It wasn't like that," Sam said, defending himself.

"Would you idjits shut-up? I'm trying to concentrate over here!" Bobby finally interjected. "Y'all need to go outside and deal with your petty crap. Actually, let me save you the trouble; Sam, you were quick to judge. Cas, you suck at communication. Dean, you're the idiot that pissed off a goddess. Let's have a big friggen group hug now that it's all settled," Bobby yelled at the three of them.

They stood there in silence, each of them embarrassed at how simple it all really was. "I need a beer," Dean said, heading for the fridge. He pulled out two, popped the caps off, and came back to the main room. The older brother handed Sam the second beer, an immediate end of the fight they were just having. They both took large gulps and patted each other on the back in a brotherly way.

"So Cas, how'd you find the Book of the Dead?" the younger brother asked, hoping the tension between them was gone.

At first, the angel appeared to me frustrated, but he dropped his guard quickly. "I wasn't even sure it existed anymore. It's been over a millennia since there was a sighting of the book. I used certain frequencies to-"

"Okay, let's not get into all that," Dean interjected, "Give us the _Reader's Digest_ version."

"I don't understand what digestion has to do with the story," the angel said, tilting his head to the side in confusion.

"He means, tell the short version," Sam explained, a small smile on his lips.

"Oh... I followed a lead to China, where the book was well guarded by traps and hidden deep inside a tomb. There is a reason this book was so hard to come by, whoever hid it had good reason to. It holds extraordinary power, both helpful and destructive." He failed to mention how many of his own kind he'd killed for this book, how weary he was from constant searching, or how he would have done it again. The other angels told him he was selfish, maybe Cas was but if anyone deserved to live, it was Dean Winchester. He remembers what one of the angels said to him before she died. "_You choose the humans over your own family_?" Castiel replied to her "_They are my family."_

Dean took a drink of his beer, a proud look graced his face as he looked at the angel. "Thanks Cas. Without you, I don't know what I'd do." The words had a very clear double meaning to the both of them. Castiel just smiled and looked at his charge.

"How very touching," Bobby's voice thick with sarcasm. "Now, I wasn't joking when I said get out. I'm trying to save your sorry ass and I need some peace and quiet for it."

"Heard you loud and clear. Come on Sammy, Baby needs her oil changed," Dean said while patting his younger brother on his shoulder.

"Uh, how about I stay inside. It's pretty cold out today. Take Cas," Sam said with a smile.

"Let's just get out of Bobby's hair."

The bearded man, without looking up from the book, "Sam can stay. He'll be quiet." The younger brother grinned and sat on the couch.

"Oh come on," Dean said jokingly irritated. "Fine, come on Cas." The older brother grabbed the beer out of Sam's hands and gave it to the angel. With a playful scowl, Sam crossed his arms.

Castiel and his charge stepped out of the warm house into the unseasonable cold. "Jesus," Dean said as they walked out to the Impala. He tugged the sleeves of his plaid shirt, hoping the extra bit of coverage would help him stay warm. "I'm going to show you how to change oil." He took a swig of his beer and set it on the ground. "You know you're supposed to drink it," Dean motioned to Cas's bottle.

"Oh right, because I'm socially obligated to," the angel stated before downing his beer and setting the empty bottle next to Dean's.

"Wow. I bet you're a real hit at frat parties," the green eyed man said with a smile as he popped the hood of the Impala.

"What is a frat party?" Cas asked.

"It's a party where a whole bunch of guys go and make asses of themselves. Now come here, I want to show you this."

Castiel stood with his chest directly against Dean's back, looking over his shoulder at the engine. Almost on instinct, he nearly told the angel to maintain personal space after so many times he reminded Cas. But he enjoyed it, leaning against the angel, thankful for the warmth. "Okay, you see this right here?" Dean pointed to a part, "That's the dipstick. Now, before I go and change the oil, I want to see how much there is. So you take it out," he pulled out the dipstick, "and you wipe it with a rag. Mind handing one? Should be right on the bench." The angel stepped away for a few seconds to grab a rag, handing it to Dean. He wiped the oil away in one quick motion and continued to instruct. "You insert it back and pull it back out to see how much there is." The green eyed man put the dipstick in and pulled it back out, looking at the level of oil film on the metal. "It's a bit low, I could just add more but since we've been banished out here, I'll change it. You with me so far?" he asked while turning towards Castiel.

"Yes. I'm with you," he repeated, although he had a very thorough understanding of how engines work, he enjoyed Dean "teaching" him. They went through the entire oil changing process, Cas blissfully playing dumb. The angel even allowed a bit to get on his chin for comedic purposes.

"I'll have to show you more some other time," Dean said laughing at the bit of oil on Castiel's face.

"I enjoyed that," a smile on Cas's face.

"Me too," Dean grinned back. He shivered from a small gist of chilly wind.

"You are cold," the angel stated.

"And you're not?"

"I can choose what sensations to feel. Here," Castiel shrugged off his coat and put it over Dean's small shoulders. The trenchcoat was quite large on Dean, but extremely warm.

"Cas, I'm fine. You don't have to," his charge protested, about to hand the coat back.

"Dean, I insist," his blue eyes piercing. The two looked at each other, looking over each other's features. "I would like to try something."

"Go ahead," Dean said, giving the green light.

Castiel raised his hand to a small lock of hair that had been too short for the ponytail. He brushed it behind Dean's ear, watching blush slowly build up. Placing his hand on Dean's freckled cheek, he leaned down to tenderly kiss his charge.

When the two broke apart, there was a bit of oil on Dean's chin, transferred from Cas. The angel laughed softly and zapped it away with his free hand.

Dean, a slight blush on his cheeks, bit his bottom lip. He looked down and then back up to Castiel. "Is there anything else you'd like to try?"

"Do you have anything in mind?" Cas's thumb gently stroking the green eyed man's soft cheek. There was no doubt that he was beautiful but Castiel thought the same about Dean before he was changed into a woman.

••••••

"Haha! Got it!" Bobby exclaimed happily.

"You found the spell?" asked Sam excitedly, putting his own book to the side.

"Oh yeah. Now all I gotta do is translate all of it. Shouldn't be too long."

"That's great! Want me to go get Cas and Dean?" the tall man asked, ready to get up.

"Nah. It ain't that cold outside. Besides, notice how quiet it is in here?" Bobby asked with a playful smile.

"You're right, it is kinda nice," he answered, leaning back on the couch, beginning to read again.

••••••

"Oh, I've got a couple ideas," Dean said with a shy smile.

Castiel leaned down and kissed his charge again, becoming slowly addicted to the feel of lips against his. "I have a few of my own," the angel said, leading Dean into the backseat of the Impala, a shelter away from the cold.

{Chapter End}


	9. Chapter 9

**{Author Note: All favorites, follows, and/or reviews are very much appreciated. Thank ya'll so much, it's very encouraging for me. Once again, thank you!}**

"You should be warmer in here," Castiel said while shutting the door to the back seat. He was right, but Dean was still rather cold. It took a moment for him to realize that although it wasn't that chilly, he felt like he was freezing.

"Thanks for lending me your coat," Dean said while wrapping it tightly around him.

"I don't mind. Tell me, how are you feeling?" the angel asked. First he wanted to ask before using his powers to determine it for himself.

"Fine," his charge answered nonchalantly.

"Dean, don't lie to me," Castiel's voice stern.

Immediately, the classic Dean Winchester wall went up. "I said I'm fine, Cas," he snapped, a bit disappointed if this is what Castiel meant when he said he had ideas.

Instead of fighting with him, the angel reached out and touched Dean's forehead, the man recoiling from the touch. He made contact for just a second, but it was enough to tell. "Dean, you're not well."

"I said I'm fine," he began to get out of the car, but Cas grabbed onto his hand. Not hard, just enough to get his attention. Dean settled back into his seat, the angel not letting go of his hand.

"Why haven't you told anyone?" Castiel asked.

The green eyed man let out a small laugh. "You should've seen the look on Sammy's face when he thought he could fix me. He ran out the house, pretty much tackled me. I couldn't take that from him."

"I understand, although you should not have to be in pain. Give me your other hand," Castiel instructed. Obliging, Dean held out his hand allowing the angel to take it. "Close your eyes."

"Why? You gonna kiss me again?" Dean asked with a grin.

"Perhaps later. Close your eyes," Cas repeated.

"Alright," he closed his eyes, still smiling. A feeling of warmth spread from the tips of his fingers, twisting pleasantly through his hands, arms and to his chest. It was pulsing and twirling through him, raising goosebumps. In that moment, as the heat spread down his legs, all Dean was aware of was his own body and the closeness of the angel. Nothing else mattered. No longer cold or tired, he felt relaxed, even peaceful. Castiel watched his charge'a face relax from smiling into serenity. Almost as if he was sleeping. On Cas's end, he felt a pleasant tingling as power left his body and went into Dean's. To share his energy, the energy of an angel. This was unheard of, an Angel of The Lord sharing his essence with a "lowly" human, but Cas was special. He didn't see humans as lower than himself... especially Dean.

Castiel let go of one of Dean's hands, and placed it on his cheek, leaning forward to press their lips together. When he pulled away, Dean opened his eyes and smiled again, "Thought you weren't going to kiss me."

"I lied," the angel answered. Dean pulled him back into a kiss, lying back on the seat bringing Cas down with him. On his back, the green eyed man ran his hands soothingly over Castiel's neck. This was more of what Dean had in mind when he got into the backseat with Cas. The angel was laying between his charge's legs, a hand on his cheek and the other on his hip. The kiss was innocent, sweet, and exploratory. There were no ulterior motives behind it, just wanting to be close, to feel each other.

"Cas?" he asked after breaking the kiss.

"Yes Dean? Have I done something wrong? I apologize, I'm still lear-" the angel interrupted by Dean putting a finger to his lips.

"Hold up. I didn't say that so just calm down. I was... wondering... is this maybe... too fast?" he asked hesitantly. It was difficult to know the pace of a couple in a normal relationship, but an angel and his charge that was gender swapped is even more confusing.

"This is a puzzling predicament," Castiel said, thinking deeply about it. "Would you prefer us to be... slower?"

"I really hate talking about this kind of crap," Dean muttered awkwardly.

"Are you uncomfortable with what we were just doing?" the angel asked, his voice it's usual gravel.

"No," he answered plainly.

"The simplest solution is to stop when we begin to feel rushed or uncomfortable," Cas stated.

"Why didn't I think of that?"

"You were over thinking the situation. Here, we'll test it," said Castiel, leaving a kiss on Dean's cheek. "How do you feel now?" he asked, kissing the neck of his charge.

"F-fine," Dean let out, completely surprised as the angel mirrored what Dean had done earlier that day, kissing up and down his neck.

"Are you feeling any discomfort?" Castiel asked, although he knew the answer; he just wanted Dean to say it.

Dean hummed a quiet 'no,' his eyes shutting as he let Cas play with his neck and throat, until he very softly bit his charge's earlobe. An uncontrollable shiver ran down Dean's spine. "We-we should stop now." It felt amazing, too amazing, Dean thought. Immediately, the angel stopped and went back to eye level with his charge. Dean reached up and ran his fingers through Castiel's dark hair, musing it this way and that with his fingers. "Think we should go inside soon?" asked Dean.

"Yes, however I do enjoy just lying here with you."

"Me too, buddy," he said as he leaned up to kiss the angel's cheek. This was all so new, and Dean couldn't help but feel so... chick flick-y. He found it sickening yet inviting. "Let's get up before I fall asleep," he said.

Castiel exited the Impala, waiting for the green eyed man to follow. He slowly sat up, his back aching but his chest relived. Stepping out into the cold, he wrapped Cas's trench coat around himself, closing the backseat door. While they walked past all the rusted and stacked cars around Bobby's property, Dean asked "How hard was it to find the Book of the Dead?"

"Moderately difficult. Once we are done with it, I shall either destroy it or put it somewhere safe. It holds powerful and dangerous magic."

"I say destroy it. I mean, how long will it be before something evil found it? Can't take that risk," Dean kicked a small rock as they moved closer to the darkly painted house.

"There is the problem of not knowing how to destroy it. I could put it in an underwater volcano, that way no one could reach it."

"You can do that?" surprise in Dean's voice.

Castiel let out a small laugh as they reached the door. Handing the coat back to the angel, they entered the home, taking in Bobby scribbling furiously on a piece of paper.

"Cas, you got a little oil on your chin," Sam pointed out with a laugh.

"Oh right," the angel said, the oil disappearing from his face as he remembered it's presence.

"How's it comin' Bobby?" Dean asked, sitting next to his brother on the couch.

"Almost done. Cas is gonna have to go fetch most of it, since I bet we won't be able to find," the old man paused to look at the ingredient list, "sand from the bottom of the Nile."

"Will you need backup?" Dean asked Castiel.

The younger brother peeked over his book and at Dean. "I think Cas can handle himself. Anyway, you shouldn't put yourself in any danger in your condition."

"In my condition? As a woman?" asked the older brother, his voice daring Sam to keep talking. Instead, he bit down on his lip. "You think I can't do it. That I'm not as strong?"

"That's not what I sa-"

"You know what, shut-up. Bobby, give me the list. Cas and I will go get it," the older brother said, standing from the couch, glaring at Sam.

"If you think that's wise," Bobby said, reluctantly holding the finished list out to Dean. He took it and glanced over the paper.

"Let's go, Cas," Dean said, stepping towards the angel.

"Dean," Castiel placed his hands on Dean's shoulders. "No one doubts your ability. However, I cannot take you with."

"Come on, buddy."

"You don't have anything to prove. We know what you're capable of," his voice lowered to where only his charge could hear him, "You're not a damsel in distress." He took the list and disappeared.

••••••

"Castiel has left the premises. I need to move in before he returns," a deep voice said as he watched over Bobby's house.

"Right," the child answered

••••••

Dean shoved his hands in his pockets, he leaned against the wall, looking over the room. "This is bullshit," he muttered as he stormed out, up the stairs and into his room. While alone, he released his anger, punching the nearest wall. Low and behold, he was just as strong as when he was a man, leaving a dent. Dean looked down to survey his knuckles, none broken thankfully.  
_You're not a damsel in distress._

The words played over and over in his head as Dean stood motionless, fists clenched at his side. If he wasn't just some damsel, why wouldn't Castiel bring him with, Dean wondered. He heard a flutter of wings behind him. "Already back, Cas?"

"Not quite," the voice unfamiliar.

Dean spun around, a man in a suit stood close to him. "Pleasure to make your acquaintance, Dean." The angel had peppered grey hair, his goatee the same.

"Who the hell are you?"

"If you must know, Johnias. Now that we're done with pleasantries, let's talk business, shall we?" the older angel asked.

"What kind of business?" Dean asked, slowly backing away, towards the bed.

"Castiel located a lost artifact, then took it upon himself to steal it. He has killed over a dozen of my brothers and sisters in pursuit of it. It seems that he can not be reasoned with, hence why I'm speaking with you."

"Wait, so Cas has..." Dean didn't finish the thought as he came to the realization that Castiel had been killing his own kind, slowly taking another step back.

"None of that matters now. It can be forgiven, if and only if the Book of the Dead is handed over," Johnias took a step closer.

"And if we don't?" taking another step away, his back against the nightstand now.

"Hopefully we won't have to discuss that," the angel closed the distance between them and looked down at Dean. He placed his hand on Dean's jutted out chin, looking down at the human. "I wonder why Castiel is so fond of you."

"Doesn't matter," Dean gritted his teeth. "Let's make a deal already."

"The deal is if give me the book and Castiel will be forgiven of his crimes against his own family. He will be taken back to Heaven, away from you so his judgment will no longer be clouded," Johnias said, looking down into Dean's green eyes.

"Seems like a crappy deal, what do I get?" Dean asked, his jaw tense and his muscles rigid.

"Oh you humans. Always so greedy," the angel said, turning his back to Dean and stepping away.

As quietly as possible, Dean put his hands behind him, feeling for the drawer on his nightstand. "So, you gonna negotiate something?"

The angel let out a sigh, "What is it you would like?"

Dean opened the drawer and grabbed the metal object. "Your corpse on my floor."

"What?!" Johnias exclaimed as he turned around, seeing Dean holding an angel blade. Before he could react, Dean jumped forward and jammed it deep into the angel's chest, the room filling with a white light. His body fell back on the floor, leaving the marks of scorched wings.

"Sam, Bobby, get your asses up here," Dean yelled.

In just a few moments, they were in Dean's room, all of them looking down at Johnias's body.

"What the hell happened?" Bobby asked.

"Angels are after the book. We gotta make angel hex bags, and now," the older brother explained.

"I'm on it," Bobby said as he went down the stairs.

"You okay?" Sam asked, sitting on Dean's bed.

"I'm fine. Gonna take some serious elbow grease to get these scorches up," the older brother said, setting his angle blade back on the nightstand. "You know I can handle my own."

"Dean, this has nothing to do with," Sam waved his hand up and down at his brother, "that. It's because the curse itself has made you weaker, not because you're a woman. That's the only reason I'm worried. There's no need to get defensive."

"Oh, well Cas gave me a bit of his 'angel juice.' It really worked wonders," Dean said, looking back down at the body on his floor. "What do we do with this bastard?"

The younger brother thought for a second then shrugged his shoulders. "Bury him outside?"

Letting out an overdramatized sigh, Dean answered, "Grab his feet, I got his arms."

After burying the creepy angel, the brothers walked back to the house, both of them carrying shovels and covered sufficiently in dirt after burying the angel.  
"How long has Cas been gone?" the younger brother asked.

"Couple hours."

Once they reached the house, they leaned their shovels against the wall and dusted themselves off as best as they could before entering the home. Bobby looked up at the boys, talking into his FBI designated phone. He waved at them to keep walking.

"You think he's run into any angels?" Sam asked.

"I hope not. Either way, he can be pretty scrappy. You wanna shower first?" Dean tried to push out any worry he had.

"Nah, you go ahead. Ladies first," Sam said, not thinking before he spoke. He was extremely thrown off when he felt a solid punch to his shoulder. "Sorry!"

"Yeah yeah."

••••••

"It's been three days," Dean said, angrily pacing back an forth. "Something's happened."

"We can't know that for sure," the younger brother said, leaning against Bobby's desk. His hands shaking, Dean tried to roll up the sleeves of his plaid shirt, unable to do so with the violent shaking. Sam stepped forward and grabbed his older brother by the upper arms and held him in place. "You need to calm down. Here," Sam rolled up Dean's sleeves for him.

"Thanks," his voice quiet. "How am I supposed to calm down? Cas has been gone for three days now, without any word back to us. Angels probably jumped him."

"Or, he could be busy trying to find the spell components. And you said it yourself, he can handle his own. Hey hey hey, don't do that. It's still only morning," the younger brother said as Dean poured himself a second glass of bourbon. "How are you still standing after last night?"

"High tolerance over the years, Sammy," Dean answered as he took a large gulp, purposefully not wincing from the burn. He gave his tall brother a painful smile, the kind that was completely fake.

"Didn't you take some uppers earlier?" Sam asked, becoming concerned for his brother's health.

"Forgot about that. Yes I did."

"You're going to OD if you don't stop," Sam slammed a fist down on the desk next to him.

"I'll be fine. We need to get Cas back."

"No," Sam seemed so exasperated, "we need to get food in you and sober you up."

"Dean, I swear to god, I will shove these biscuits down your throat," Bobby yelled from the kitchen as he cooked a batch of biscuits and gravy.

"I'd like to see you try," Dean said angrily, about to leave the room.

"Grab him!" the old man yelled to Sam. He reached out for Dean, holding onto his shirt collar.

"Let go of me, Sammy!" The older brother struggled against his much larger brother.

"Stop acting like a child," Sam dragged him over to the kitchen table and forcefully sat him in a chair.

"You're gonna shut-up, lay off the sauce, and eat your goddamn breakfast," Bobby scolded Dean as he dished up a serving for him. He set the plate of biscuits and gravy in front of Dean, glaring down at him.

After some time, Dean ate the entire serving in front of him, even got a second helping. It helped clear his head, which was not what he wanted. Over and over, all he could think about was the angel; was he okay? Dead? Hiding? It consumed Dean.

"I knew someone should've gone with him," Dean said through gritted teeth as he sipped at the hot black coffee.

"We didn't think he needed backup," Bobby said, taking his hat off and scratching underneath it.

"So we've all prayed to him, not much else we can do," Sam continued to eye his brother, extremely worried about him.

"Hey," Dean seemed to perk up as a thought hit him, "We can summon him!"

"Would that work?" The younger brother asked, his eyebrows crinkled together.

"We can always try," the bearded man said as he gathered the supplies.

"Ready?" Bobby asked the boys(girl) as he was about to light a match and throw it in the bowl. Dean nodded solemnly, not sure what he was expecting.

"Okay," he dropped the match, setting the ingredients on fire.

Nothing happened.

Nothing. Happened.

Everyone looked at each other, eyes wide as they waited, hoping he would show up. This could only mean one thing: Castiel was dead.

{Chapter End}

**{AN: This is of course not the end! Didn't want to make you think it stopped here! There will be more, promise.}**


	10. Chapter 10

The dark haired angel was transporting from place to place, trying to throw the other angels off his trail. He held a bag full of the spell components, unable to return to Bobby's house in fear of being followed. Castiel heard the prayers of his charge, worried about him. He felt torn, unable to ease Dean's mind as he was being chased around the world.

A deep tugging sensation erupted from deep within his gut, pulling him out of the air and onto the ground. He was being summoned by someone. Feeling his body crash back to earth, he quickly surveyed his surroundings. He was in a spacious empty warehouse, grey and bleary light coming in through the large windows, indicating it was raining outside. Before him stood an angel, a young boy with curly brown hair and soft brown eyes.

"Abraham," Castiel said as a greeting.

"Castiel... Thank you for coming on such short notice," a small and devious smile on Abraham's face.

"Enough of this game," Cas said.

"I'm not playing a game, it seems that you are. Enjoying your hide-and-go-seek with Heaven?" the little boy asked, looking so innocent and sweet but Cas knew better. "Oh Castiel, how weary I am of chasing you."

"Then stop," he said plainly.

"I wish I could, but you have something important that I want," Abraham said.

"The Book of the Dead, I know," Cas answered impatiently.

"We've given you many chances, you're about to run out. Actually, you have. Hand the book over or the Winchesters die. No more negotiating."

"No, _I've_ given _you_ chances. You cease pursuing me, or I will kill you," the dark haired angel said, his grip tight on his bag.

"I'd like to see you try," the small angel said, igniting the ring of holy oil around Castiel. He inwardly cursed as he looked down at the wretched fire. "Try and runaway now," Abraham said mockingly.

Cas felt the deep tugging again, like he was being summoned by someone else, but with the holy fire surrounding him, he could not move. The pain of being pulled elsewhere while being anchored on the spot ripped through him.

••••••

"Dean, Dean! Catch him, Sam" Bobby yelled.

Dean dropped to his knees, slamming down onto the ground. He was unable to support himself as Sam grabbed him and pulled him to a standing position, wrapping an arm around his waist.

"Not Cas," Dean mumbled, looking down at the bowl.

Sam and Bobby stared at each other, both of then unsure of what to say or do. "Here, sit down," the younger brother said as he sat him on the couch. "Dean, look at me," he said as he stooped in front of Dean. He looked up very slowly, his mind seemed elsewhere.

"Cas is dead," Dean said, his voice flat. Wanting to comfort him, Sam could only look at his brother, a hand on Dean's arm.

"Sam, c'mere," Bobby said. The younger brother backed away from Dean and to his pseudo father, following him out of the room and out of Dean's earshot. "If Cas is..." he couldn't finish the phrase, "we can't make the weapon to gank Isis."

"Unless we can convince her, Dean may be stuck as a woman," Sam realizing how serious this was.

"Yeah. Right now, we've gotta give him space but keep an eye on him. Dean's gotten close to the edge before and he's about headin' for it again," neither of them wanted to admit how far Dean had went before, nearly ODing in his lack of self control.

"I'll stick close to him," the younger brother's voice very somber, running through the several times Dean has scared him, thinking he would lose his brother to alcohol or prescription medication.

They both went back in the room, seeing Dean sit quietly, his hands twined together as he blankly stared at a wall. "Dean?" Sam said, his voice soft.

"Hmmm?" the older brother responded, not looking up at Bobby or Sam.

"We've gotta talk about this."

Suddenly, Dean was on his feet, "Talk about what? That we let Cas down? That he's dead? That we didn't give him back up? Or how about that without the weapon, I'm stuck as a woman? Not just a woman, no no, of course the curse has to do more, because you know nothing is simple in our lives. Once the curse eats me up, it's headin' straight for my soul which is just fan-friggen-tastic." By the end, Dean was nearly shouting. No one said anything as all three of them stood there in silence, unsure of what to say or do. It seemed like hours went by before Dean broke the tension by angrily saying "I'm gettin'some air," as he went outside.

Before he knew it, he was outside, walking in a random direction. The air was cool and made Dean shiver slightly, the memory of Castiel handing over his trench coat was playing across his mind. He walked aimlessly, his mind racing yet blank at the same time. Dean didn't know if he had been walking for minutes, hours, days, he couldn't tell anymore. Finally, he somehow circled around to the Impala, unsure of how he had even found his way there. There seemed to be a heavy weight in his pockets, pulling him down. The keys. The green-eyed man was on autopilot as he got behind the wheel, started the engine, and drove off.

••••••

"Bobby! Dean's leaving," Sam said hurriedly, looking out the window and running to the door. By the time he was out of the house, the Impala was fading off in the distance. "Damn it. Should we follow him?"

"You bet your ass we will. I've gotta hide the Book of the Dead first," Bobby said, placing the heavy metal bound book in a box. He took out a marker and quickly drew angel wards on one side of the box and demon wards on the other. "There, I'll grab my keys."

••••••

"How long do you plan to keep me here, Abraham?" Cas asked, trying to remain levelheaded.

"Until I hear that your precious little monkeys have been dealt with. Then, after you realize it was your own doing that killed them, I'm going to drop their bodies in front of you. I may even dance on them if I'm feeling up for it, which I probably will," the young angel said with a toothy and malicious grin.

"You are twisted," Cas said in disgust.

"Oh no Castiel. I'm not twisted, you are. I've seen what you've done... what you've thought of," Abraham winked at the dark haired angel. Castiel felt his face turn red in a mix of anger and embarrassment. "You've been thinking about that little whore, all the nasty things you want to do with her... or him, whatever you want to call Dean."

"Shut your mouth," Castiel said firmly.

"Let's start with the filthy things you want with his mouth, shall we? You've thought about Dean's mouth on your co-"

"I said be silent!" Castiel yelled, thunder crashing loudly around the warehouse. The sound of rain hitting the roof nearly deafening in their silence.

"You're sick and unfit for Heaven. No angel should lust, especially after that booze soaked slut." The words were so unnatural coming from such a sweet looking boy. The large windows began to buckle under the wind force outside and the hail raining down. Abraham seemed unbothered by it, still staring at Castiel.

••••••

In town, Bobby and Sam caught sight of the Impala, parked in front of the cafe. "He must've went on by foot. Knew we'd be looking for his car," Bobby said, parking in front of the same cafe. "Wanna start with the bars?"

"That'd be my best guess. Can't believe he turned off the GPS on his phone," the younger brother said with a sigh.

••••••

Dean sat at a bar, leaning his forearms against it, sipping at his whiskey, his shoulders hunched in an obvious 'leave-me-alone' manner. He didn't even notice what the bartender looked like, male or female. The room was a blur, just a stereotypical bar, nothing special. There were a few groups and several people off on their own, scattered around. Dean was so spaced out, he didn't even know what kind of music was playing. All he could hear was his own thoughts screaming at him.

"So tell me darling, what's your name?" a man leaned next to Dean. He seemed nice enough, a little too cocky.

"Why would you want to know my name?" Dean asked, tapping the glass in front of him for a refill. The tender (it was a young redhead woman) poured him a double and went on to someone else.

"You look like you could use someone to talk to. My name's Brian," he said, leaning a little closer.

Dean looked over at him, noticing that he was in fact attractive, dirty blonde with dimples. But that didn't mean anything to Dean. "Nice to meet you, Brian," he said flatly. Dean would give anything to be a man right now, to not be bothered by anyone, just sit here to himself.

"Still not going to tell me your name?" Brian asked, politely smiling.

Dean sipped from his drink. "Nope."

"You have perfected the cold shoulder... I'll just call you Sophie," Brian said, causing Dean to raise an eyebrow. "So tell me Sophie, what's brought you here?"

"Well, I wanted to not be bothered by anyone and drink in peace," Dean said pointedly.

"So you come out to do that? Pretty lady like you should know better than that," he said, charming and sweet. The kind of way Dean would be to women.

"Listen Brian, you seem like a," Dean paused and thought for a moment, "swell guy. But really, if you don't mind, I'd like to be alone right now." He cleared his throat, "I'm in mourning or whatever right now."

"I promise I'll leave you alone, I just have to ask, mourning over who?" he asked curiously.

"My best friend. Guess you could call him my uh... my boyfriend or something? Not really sure what it was, but he's gone now, so please..."

"I'm very sorry, here," Brian placed a twenty dollar bill in front of Dean. "I got your drinks. Have a nice night, Sophie" he said with a nod before walking across the room and to his group.

"You too," Dean said quietly, downing the rest of his drink. He stood from the bar and walked out, not wobbling or anything. Despite his female body and weight change, he still had a dramatically high tolerance.

Dean walked back to Baby, twenty minutes away from the bar. He saw Bobby's car parked nearby and rolled his eyes as he climbed into the Impala and drove home.

••••••

"Have you seen a woman in here, light brown hair, green eyes? Wearing plaid?" Sam asked a bartender, the third they'd come across.

"Ah yeah. 'Bout a hour ago," she said, recalling.

"Any idea where she coulda gone to?" Bobby asked.

"Not a clue. Sorry I can't really help you. Maybe you could ask Brian about it."

"Who the hell is Brian?" Sam asked, concerned for Dean.

"Oh, he's right over there," the bartender pointed to a man seated with two other guys, all threw of them drinking Budweiser.

"Thanks for your time," Sam said before he and Bobby walked over to the small group of men. "Brian?"

"That's me. How can I help y'all tonight?" Brian asked.

"The bartender told us you spoke to a young woman earlier."

"Oh, you mean Sophie," Brian answered.

"Sophie?" Bobby asked.

"Oh, that's just what I called her. She didn't give me her real name. You friends of hers?" the dirty blonde man asked.

"Family," Sam answered, "Would you have any idea where she went?"

"I'm sorry guys, I wish I could help, but I don't know where she is."

"Thanks," Sam said, sighing deeply.

"Not a problem."

Sam and Bobby walked outside, both of them trying to concentrate. "You think Dean headed home?" the talk man asked.

"Always worth a shot to see if his car his still in town," Bobby said as they began to walk back to the cafe.

••••••

Dean pulled up to his usual spot and parked. He gripped the wheel tightly after turning off the engine, and held onto it with white knuckles. After his fingers began to ache, he got out and looked at the Impala. All he could see was the goddamn angel, helping him change the oil, even getting some on his chin like a dork. "Damn it, Cas." Dean picked up a crowbar and stared at it in his small hands.

Everything went blank after that, Dean coming to with the still crowbar in his hand, the other bloody and cut. He looked up to see that he had smashed in the windows of the Impala, and left horrendous dents in the hood. The car was in terrible shape, but luckily, his knuckles weren't so bad. Dean vowed to fix Baby, upset at himself for blacking out and tearing up the Impala the way he had.

••••••

The rain continued to beat down on the roof, the wind growing stronger. Castiel had been focusing his powers to create a storm outside, using every ounce of energy he had to break the warehouse windows open, without Abraham becoming suspicious.

"Oh, you hear that," the little angel said, putting a hand to his temple. "It seems as though an angel has her eyes on Dean... right now." Abraham continued to listen to the 'angel radio.' He let out a quick laugh, "Shouldn't be too long now."

Cas glared at Abraham, hoping he could escape soon, and terrified of what was going to happen to his charge.

••••••

There was a soft flutter of wings behind Dean, "You cut your hand pretty bad."

Dean spun around to see the red haired bartender standing there, holding none other than the classic angel blade.

"Didn't know you made house calls," Dean said, looking the angel up and down, angry at himself for leaving his hexbag at home before he had run off. She wore normal blue jeans and a black tank top, her hair in spiraling curls past her shoulders. "You want the goddamn book, you can have it. I'm tired of fighting with you assholes over it."

"It's not just about the book, I mean, this is my revenge for all of the damage that you, your brother, your uncle, and Castiel have caused, so you'd better hold on little girl," she said tauntingly.

"Oh you bitch," Dean said, bracing himself as the angel ran at him, the angel blade raised in front of her. Dean grabbed her wrist and kept her from stabbing it into his chest, his injured hand aching and bleeding. The weight threw Dean onto his back, the red haired angel straddling his waist, the blade poised over his breast bone. Much to both of their surprise, Dean was able to keep her from piercing his chest.

Dean's eyes began to shine a bright and unnatural blue, strength coursing through his body. "How could you-" the angel yelled, pushing down as hard as she could. Another burst of strength went through Dean, now grabbing onto the angel's blade and turning it back towards her chest. He pushed the blade against the angel's strength until the tip went into the her chest. She began screaming loudly, light coming from the wound as Dean pushed it up, slowly, until it was as deep as it could go.

"Who's the little girl now?" Dean asked through gritted teeth, the angel in front of him pouring light out of her mouth and eyes, her body going limp.

••••••

"What?!" Abraham yelled, his eyes wide in anger and surprise, seeing his angel lacky be killed by Dean through 'angel radio.' The windows above him and Castiel shattered, rain now coming in. "How could he possibly..." the small angel looked over at Cas, the both of them now being rained on. "You gave him your power?! You disgust me!" Abraham pulled his blade from the inside of his jacket. "I've had enough of this! I'll have to take care of the Winchesters myself, but you first."

The wind kicked up the rain, dowsing the holy fire ring. Castiel dropped the bag of ingredients, lunging forward and snatching the angel blade from Abraham. Cas grabbed Abraham by the throat, forcing the little angel's mouth open, he jammed the blade into Abraham's open mouth and out the back of his head. The sound of bone crunching as the little angel's head was threatening to split open was drowned out by the high pitched scream that escaped from around the angel blade. White light filled the warehouse, the two of them becoming soaked from the rainfall. Cas pulled the blade out of Abraham's corpse and wiped the blood on the little angel's jacket. "That's for calling Dean a whore," he said angrily, looking down at the dead angel, hate and loathing in his eyes.

The holy fire now gone, Cas was immediately summoned to the next location he was meant to go to. He was weightless as he traveled at light speeds, then slamming down like a sack of bricks when he reached his destination. Bobby's house.

{Chapter End}


	11. Chapter 11

Castiel was standing in the middle of Bobby's empty living room, zapping outside to Dean and the dead angel.

"Cas?" his charge asked, standing up quickly and staring at the dark haired angel. "I don't believe it." Dean stared at Cas, his eyes wide and beginning to well with tears, looking at the angel in his trench coat and suit.

Castiel didn't speak. He grabbed Dean by the hips and pulled him to the angel's chest, crashing their lips together, the kiss passionate and intense. Dean pulled away, breathing heavily, "You're alive," a tear running down his cheek. He hadn't allowed himself to cry at all, not after thinking Cas was dead, but now he felt this release of happiness so strong that he couldn't fight back the tears.

"I'm so sorry, Dean," the angel said earnestly, gently using his thumb to wipe away the green eyed man's tears.

"Where... how?" Dean asked, grabbing onto Cas, feeling the angel, making sure he was real.

"I was summoned by the angel Abraham. Before that, I was being chased and couldn't risk bringing them to you. I'm sorry I worried you."

"We thought... I thought you were dead," Dean said, gripping tighter onto Castiel, blood dripping from his wounded hand.

The angel wasn't sure what to say, all he could do was kiss Dean's forehead. Cas looked down to see the bloody hand, "You were injured. Here," the angel touched the wound, healing it, all traces of blood gone. Dean flexed his fingers gratefully and used his now healed hand to pull Castiel into another intense kiss, their bodies pressed against each other. The spiteful words of Abraham came into Cas's mind, but he didn't care if what he wanted was 'wrong' because it felt right. Castiel placed his forehead against Dean's and took several deep breathes. "Dean, I... I was afraid. I still am."

"Don't be scared."

They stood there, holding each other as if they might disappear before their own eyes.

"This is all so very new," Castiel said, brushing a lock of hair behind Dean's ear.

"Are you going to tell me you've never felt like this before?" Dean joked with a large smile.

"That is true, though," the angel said plainly. "I have never encountered these feelings before."

"You are such a dork. C'mere," Dean leaned upwards to kiss his angel. And yes, Dean thought of Castiel as his own angel. "Why are you afraid?"

"I feel things... I want things that are... unspeakable for angels. I'm afraid of my desires," the dark haired angel explained.

"What are your desires?"

"You."

Dean felt a blush creep up his cheeks, his face becoming hot under the blue eyed gaze of the angel. He was unsure of what to say. "Let me help you." Holding onto Castiel's hand, he lead the angel to the house and once inside, they went to Dean's designated room, both kicking off their shoes. He quietly shut the door behind him and pulled Cas to the bed. "Do you trust me?"

"Yes," Castiel answered.

Dean pressed his lips to the angel's neck as he removed the trench coat and dropped it to the side. Cas let out a small moan as his charge bit down lightly, Dean's hands moving without thinking, taking off Castiel's suit jacket and then the damned backwards tie. As Dean began to unbutton the white shirt, the angel stepped backwards until he was sitting on the bed, pulling Dean down onto his lap. Castiel was obviously aroused, getting lost in the moment. Just what Dean wanted, hoping Cas wouldn't be scared.

The shirt open and being pushed off, the angel pulled Dean into a kiss, surprising him. Castiel flicked his tongue into his charge's mouth, delightfully throwing him off for only a few seconds before Dean reciprocated.

Castiel was still afraid, but that was a part of the thrill, both of their hearts beating wildly as Cas shocked Dean again, grabbing the hem of Dean's t-shirt and breaking the kiss to pull it over his head. He leaned back on the bed, looking up at Dean, over his freckled shoulders, antiposession tattoo, slender collarbones, and over Dean's black bra. Castiel took a deep breath in as he watched a blush cover Dean's cheeks and neck, glancing back up at Dean biting his bottom lip.

The angel rubbed his hands up and down Dean's back, feeling the smooth skin under his fingers. He sat back up, kissing over Dean's exposed shoulders and collarbones, biting up his neck. Dean let out a soft moan, one that was embarrassing and unexpected. Before he could become shy of it though, the moan seemed to push Castiel over the edge. Cas wrapped his arms around Dean and rolled over while holding onto his charge, allowing them both to be lying on the bed, Dean on the bottom. Much like he had back at the motel, Castiel sat up and began to remove Dean's jeans, keeping his blue eyes locked on Dean. He threw them over the side of the bed and looked down to admire Dean's body, as if he was a sculpture. Fine art, Cas thought as he looked at Dean's flushed face. "You remind me of Venus," the angel said, noticing all of the scars across the exposed skin, committing each one to memory.

"Cas," Dean said softly, propping himself up on an elbow, a hand reaching out for the angel's belt. Slowly, painstakingly, the green eyed man undid and slid the belt off, dropping it to the side. Castiel's breath became shallow as his pants were unbuttoned and unzipped. He brought his lips to Dean's while Dean slipped them down his hips, fingers brushing over skin teasingly. Castiel quickly worked them the rest of the way off, leaving him only in plaid boxers and Dean in a black bra and matching panties.

Although Dean was technically not a virgin, he certainly felt like this was his first time, lying back on the bed, pulling Cas down with him. Castiel was hard, pressing against Dean, unintentionally grinding into him.

"Are you still afraid?" Dean asked.

Leaning his forehead to rest on Dean's the angel answered, "Terrified." Castiel ran a hand up and down the outside of Dean's thigh, tickling him in the best way. Their skin touching felt like it was on fire, a smolder underneath about to explode from beneath them.

With one hand, Dean reached behind his back to unhook the bra, ever slowly removing it, his heart beating furiously as he exposed himself. Cas looked down, then back up to Dean, making Dean anxious about the size of his breasts. "I was mistaken. You don't remind me of Venus." Dean's mouth fell open as Cas spoke, "You're so much _better," _Castiel continued saying, then kissed his charge tenderly.

Threading his fingers through Cas's dark hair with one hand, and the other he used to run his fingers over the angel's back and shoulders, causing him to raise goose bumps. Castiel supported his weight with one arm, kissing downwards, nipping lightly at Dean's collarbone. With hesitant fingers, he grabbed Dean's breast, fondling him in inexperience, learning what was good and... not so good.

Cas went back to eye level with his charge, caressing his cheek with a thumb while Dean stroked his fingers through the angel's dark hair. "Cas, I know it's obvious by now... but you're what I want, too." In response, Castiel nuzzled his nose into Dean's neck, breathing down on his skin, sending shivers throughout Dean.

"You make me feel brave," the angel said, slipping a hand down to pull away the black satin panties, the hand he rested on ran through long honey brown hair. Dean was unsure of how Castiel removed his clothes so fluidly, remembering he was in fact an angel and could bend space and time to his will... perhaps helping this be less awkward. He lay there, his female body completely exposed to the angel. "Dean," the angel said softly, burying his face in Dean's soft neck.

Dean let out a small sigh, his hands snaking down Cas's body, stopping at the waistband of his boxers, a finger slipping a underneath the band, teasing Castiel. The angel let out a low pitched laugh, "Light touches like that make me laugh," he said, unsure of what word to use.

"So you're ticklish," Dean stated with a large grin, tucking that information away for later. He lightly traced his hands up Cas's ribs, the angel letting out more uncontrolled laughs.

"Dean, please cease and desist," Castiel said through low chuckles. The green eyed man continued to tickle him, causing Cas to grow louder in his protests until Castiel grabbed onto Dean's wrists and pinned them above his head, shifting so that he held both wrists in one hand. "I asked nicely," he teased, holding Dean down with a grin plastered on his face.

"Oh, I'll get you back for that," Dean said playfully, wrapping his legs around Castiel's waist. He rocked them to the side, rolling them so Cas was now on the bottom. That didn't last very long until the angel figured out the same trick and duplicated it, putting himself back on top and Dean underneath him once more. "You're a fast learner," joked the green eyed man.

"I tend to pick up activities up with ease," the dark haired angel boasted, suddenly his smile wavering.

"What's wrong?" asked Dean, worrying Cas was regretting his decisions.

Castiel bit down on his lip and looked away, " Dean I... I'm unsure of what to do now," he said awkwardly.

A hearty and light laugh escaped Dean as he thought about how adorable his angel was. Since Cas had released his hands, Dean reached up and cupped his cheek, looking into his piercing blue eyes.

"It's-it's not funny," the angel said in embarrassment.

"Let me help you out," said Dean as he reached down, beginning to pull away Castiel's boxers. The angel took on the hint, taking them off the rest of the way, leaving them both lying together, completely exposed to each other. "Are you ready?"

Cas replied, "Yes Dean," leaving a soft kiss on his charge's lips. "I'm ready."

{Chapter End}


	12. Chapter 12

The sky was a pale blue as Bobby and Sam drove back home that morning, the last place Dean could logically be. Both of them were barely awake after driving around all night, looking for Sam's unstable brother. Bobby rubbed his eyes furiously once he parked his car in the familiar scrap yard.

"I'm too old for this shit," the old man said. He looked over to Sam, who was feeling much the same, his head leaned back against the passenger seat.

"Right now, all I want is for Dean to be home, that way I can strangle him," said Sam, stepping out of the vehicle and stretching. "Wait, do you see that?"

Bobby stood from the car, "See what?" he asked as his eyes scanned for what Sam was referring to, following behind the tall moose of a man.

"The Impala, it's been…" Sam cut off as they got closer to the black car. It had all windows smashed and broken, dents littered the hood and side panels, even a rim was busted up.

"Demolished," Bobby finished, staring with his mouth agape at the classic car. His eyes wandered over the ground, a crowbar insight. "Take a look at this," he held it up for Sam to see.

"If that's the worst thing we come across when we find him, that's the least of our worries," said Sam as he walked past the Impala, stopping in his tracks as he noticed the body of the redheaded bartender they spoke with the day before. "Bobby!" Sam pointed to the corpse, both of them staring at the angel wing scorch marks on the ground.

"Well this just went from bad to worse. Let's check inside, quick," the old man said as they hurried to the house. They stormed into the house, startled when they saw Castiel standing in the kitchen, supplies for the weapon laid out on the table in front of him.

"Cas?! You're alive!" Sam gawked, unsure of what he saw in front of him was an illusion or not. The angel was dressed in what Sam assumed to be his older brother's old dark blue jeans and black Led Zeppelin t-shirt.

"I have acquired sand from the Nile, wax from fourteen ceremonial candles, talons from a falcon that starved to death, medesium, storax oil, and lastly Osiris's crook and flail," Cas said, pointing to each item on the table.

Sam took a step forward; his eyes glued to the angel while Bobby grabbed a tumbler from the counter and poured two fingers of whiskey, taking a deep sip. "Where the hell have you been?" he asked after another swig.

"I did not mean to cause any worry. I was summoned by another angel after being pursued, which was why I did not come immediately," the dark haired angel explained.

"Have you seen Dean? Is he okay?" Sam asked hurriedly.

"Dean is doing well. He is currently resting," Castiel answered plainly.

With a small laugh, Sam ran his fingers through his hair and looked down, a wave of relief washing over him as he realized Dean was safe, "Thank god."

"I'm gonna go crash now," Bobby said as he walked out the room, stopping and turning back to the angel and tall man, "Oh, and send his ass down here when he wakes up. He's in for the ass kicking of his life," he half joked as he headed to his room, glass in hand.

"Mind telling me what happened?" Sam asked, surveying the ingredients on the table.

"I was ambushed while collecting supplies," the angel began explaining, "For fear of leading the angels back here, I had to keep them on the run. It's good you warded the Book against angels, because they figured out that it was no longer in my possession. Hex bags aren't very effective when they already know where you are."

"The angels still after the Book?"

"Not that I'm aware of. I believe the angel Abraham was leading this faction. I 'ganked' him, as you would say. I'm not sure if that will stop the rest of the angels, but I do know that it will slow them down. Since we have no more use for the Book, I will find a way to hide it again. You will have to take it out of the box before I can."

"Sure thing," Sam said as he walked into the adjacent room to retrieve the metal box with marker warding away from angels. "Can I ask… why you are wearing Dean's clothes?" he asked, bringing the book to Castiel.

"Oh right," the angel looked down at his clothes, "I was told this would be more physically comfortable than the suit. I find that I am more out of sorts in this, but I suppose I will have to get used to it."

"I see. Cas… is he really okay? He was a time bomb yesterday."

"There is no reason for your concern at this time. Dean is… sound. He was not in his right mind last night and is adamant about apologizing to you and Bobby," Castiel held his hands out for the book. The tall man handed the Book of the Dead to the angel and cocked his head to the side.

"How long have you been back?" Sam asked curiously.

"For most of the night."

Sam looked up at the ceiling and sighed, "So you're telling me, he kept his phone off all night?" He tried to hide his resentment for driving around all night, interrogating people and searching for his brother.

"I assume so, yes," Cas answered, unaware of Sam being upset.

"What did you even do all night?" he asked, trying his best to keep cool, clearly fuming.

Castiel remained quiet, remembering his charge had made himself clear that he did not want to share their relationship with Sam, although Cas still wasn't sure what to say, "Dean was very… ill. He's… been… mostly sleeping." The angel tried to survey Sam's expression, truly clueless as to how exactly he was reacting… human emotion still confused him.

With a long and drawn out sigh, Sam rubbed the bridge of his nose and looked to the side, "But he's okay now?"

"As I have stated, Dean is well."

"Alright," Sam did his best to drop the subject, instead turned his attention to the spell supplies on the table. He looked over each of the items, some in vials or bottles, while the crook and flail sat in a cross. "So this is from _the_ Osiris?"

"I am certain of it. It is quite humorous that the weapon to kill Isis comes from Osiris," the angel said, smiling to himself.

"How… how is that funny?" asked Sam, looking down at Cas with his eyebrows knit together.

"Osiris and Isis are husband and wife," Castiel began, "She resurrected him after he was murdered, a long and arduous task. Now, the weapon to destroy Isis comes from her husband… that is… hilarious."

"I think the word you're looking for is coincidental," Sam's voice lightened up towards to the awkward angel.

Castiel hummed in thought, "Perhaps. Sam, you look ill. You should rest."

"Yeah, Bobby and I were out all night. I'm going to sleep right after I check on Dean," Sam said as he walked past Cas.

"I realize I should have found you and Bobby when I came back. I'm sorry for my mistake," Castiel said to Sam's back.

"Cas, I was mad and I actually still kind of am… but I know you didn't mean any harm. It'll be fine," Sam answered earnestly before climbing up the stairs to the second floor; the wood boards creaked under his gargantuan figure.

On the landing, Sam stood in front of the cracked open door, the sight of Dean asleep in the untidy bed brought Sam to sigh in relief. The way Dean looked so relaxed, lying on his stomach; his long sandy hair was spread over the pillow and cascaded over his feminine face. For just a moment Sam didn't worry about rogue goddesses, angels out to kill them, or if Dean was going to drink himself to death. All he saw was his brother(sister) sleeping peacefully, and everything melted away. With a small smile, the younger brother backed away from the door and went back down the stairs, deciding to let Dean sleep and that he needed some of his own.

Still standing in the kitchen, Cas took a sip of coffee, his face wrinkled up at the bitter taste, "I don't see how this is appealing. It is quite unpleasant."

"Are you drinking it black?" Sam asked dropping down to the couch, his gigantic legs stretched out. He noticed just how sore he was from running around all night and how significantly drained he was. With his eyes closed, he kicked off his boots and rubbed his sock covered feet together.

"I suppose it is a dark brown, but not black. Should it be darker?" the angel asked after he took a second sip, his face still in the same expression.

"No, black means you didn't put anything in it. Try some cream and sugar," answered the moose of a man as he began to drift off to sleep.

"Cream and sugar," Cas said to himself as he searched the kitchen for the sugar, finding a clear jar full of the white grains. He grabbed a spoon from the silverware drawer, spooned in several scoops of sugar, and stirred it loudly. The angel looked into the fridge and surveyed over the contents until he spotted the cream. Castiel brought it over to his mug and began to pour in a generous helping of the cream to the dark coffee… too generous. The coffee and cream began to spill over onto the countertop before Cas realized, accidentally spacing out at first. He was brought out of his thoughts by the feeling of liquid running over his foot. With a jump, Cas looked down and saw the countertop and floor covered coffee. "Oh, oh…" he let out as he began to scramble for a hand towel. Dropping to his knees, he began to mop up the spilled coffee with the green towel until it was completely soaked and he was merely pushing around the liquid.

From behind the angel, he heard someone clear their throat, causing Cas to pop up from the ground and spin around to face Dean leaning against the doorframe. Dean's hair was ruffled and his grey shirt was loosely hanging, barely covering the navy blue boxer-briefs. The sight of Dean from his sex hair down to his slender legs caused the unfamiliar tightening in the angel's pants. "Having trouble?" Dean asked with his voice quiet so as not to wake his sleeping brother.

"I uh…" Cas stumbled with the sopping wet rag, dropping it to the floor with a _splat, _"I _am_ having difficulties," he stated.

"Let me help you," Dean said as he sauntered forward, stopping in front of the angel and looking up at him. The room was quiet, besides the rhythmic snore of Sam asleep in the adjacent room. With ease, the green eyed man cleaned up the mess the angel had made on the floor and counters, a smile on his delicate looking lips. But Cas knew better, how much those lips could do. A shudder erupted through him as he thought about Dean's beautiful lips, how they looked the exact same from when he was a man. So full and pink… and all the things they were capable of. "You alright, Cas?" asked Dean as he stood from the ground, the wet rags in hand. He placed them in the sink and took a sip from the coffee making a face of disgust. "Whoa," he let out a cough, "How much sugar did you put in here?"

"Six spoonfuls. Is it too sweet?"

"_Way_ too sweet."

The angel took a sip himself and made the same face, "I'm still trying to become accustomed to making my own coffee. It is quite a process."

Dean took the mug from him and set it down, "Want me to make you coffee? Show you what to do?"

"I would appreciate that," Castiel answered with his usual graveled voice.

As Dean grabbed another mug and began to explain how much sugar and cream one should put in coffee, the angel watched him buzz around the kitchen, his voice faraway as Cas merely stared at Dean's beauty. With a grin, Dean handed the angel a new mug with coffee, prompting him taste it. Cas took a small sip and this time thoroughly enjoyed it, "This is rather pleasant." Castiel placed the mug on the counter and reached out for the man, pulling Dean close to him. Surprised by the sudden contact, Dean's wide green eyes met Castiel's before the two began to kiss with Dean's back against the closed fridge.

It was a sweet 'Good morning' kiss, the kind Dean usually tried to avoid… but with Cas, he couldn't explain. He'd always tried to leave as quick as possible, get away and go separate ways. Except now, he didn't want the angel to leave. After last night, the thought of Cas leaving made him feel ill. For a brief moment, he wondered if this was love, but quickly squashed it. There was no way Dean Winchester, woman or man, would fall in love so easily. Not after he'd run from it for so long. So he pushed the thought away, yet still fell deeper into the sweet and gooey kiss, Cas's hands running through Dean's long hair.

"Yes, reasonably satisfying," Castiel murmured as he broke the kiss still playing with Dean's honey brown locks. He couldn't help but think of the night before as he looked down at Dean. The angel now understood why humans so heavily sought after sex; the emotional and physical connection it forges is indescribable. The way Dean called out his name… his _full name_ sent warmth through his body. He saw it clearly now: _Dean arching his back, his eyes locked on the angel's shock blue. "Castiel," Dean let out in a breathy moan as he hit the peak of his ecstasy. _It played over and over again for him, a slideshow of the angel's first time, and Dean's as a woman.

"Cas, you're freaking me out," Dean interrupted the angel's reverie. "You're just staring at me," he said as he looked up at Castiel.

"You're very beautiful," Cas said in a low voice.

Dean's cheeks were stained in a dark red, "Did I accidentally put crack in your drink?" The angel knew that his charge was attempting to deflect the compliment with a joke, a classic Dean Winchester move. As Castiel leaned down to kiss Dean on his forehead, a shrill ringing forced their attention to a phone laying on the table, aside the spell supplies. The angel reached over and handed it over to the light haired man.

The number was unfamiliar Dean noted before he flipped it open and answered. "Hello?"

On the other end, there was a deep sobbing with indistinguishable words between the crying. Dean waited for the woman on the other end to calm down.

"Who is this?" he asked, looking at the angel and shrugging.

"Can I speak to A-A-Agent Bonham?" the voice weakly asked.

"You're talking to him."

"I'm-I'm sorry. You sound like a woman over the ph-phone," she continued speaking, "You said to call if something happened. It's Amanda, Amanda Draves."

Dean's face fell as he made the realization to who it was on the other line. One of the women they had interviewed about the sudden pregnancies, the pregnancies caused by Isis. "Tell me what happened," he said as gruffly as his feminine would allow. There was more sobbing from Amanda, her voice breaking and hitching. "Amanda, you gotta take a deep breath. I can't help you unless you're calm."

She took a deep breath, letting it out slowly until her voice was no longer shaking. "I went into the nursery, and she was there."

"Who was there?" Dean asked, Cas's face going somber as he began to put it together.

"Isis… she took my baby!" Amanda screamed, crying once more.

"Damn it, did she say anything to you?" Dean leaned against the angel, feeling terribly tired and defeated all of a sudden.

"She told me it was for Osiris, that she needed my baby. I tried to stop her, but she just disappeared."

"When you first summoned her, did she say anything to you?" Dean asked, watching his angel pick up the damned Book of the Dead and began to flip through the pages. "What are you doing?" Dean mouthed at him. Cas ignored him as he continued to look through the Book.

"Isis said she wanted to help… how do you even know about that?" Amanda asked.

"Never mind that, I need you to call the other women, see if the same thing has happened to them. Call me back when you find anything, alright?"

"Alright," she answered lamely.

Dean snapped the phone shut with a deep sigh.

"With Bobby's reference, I can translate the texts. This sounds familiar," Castiel answered without looking up from the book and translation key.

"What looks familiar? Share with the class," he said, however Cas continued to ignore him as he began translating. Throwing his hands up in frustration, Dean stormed off to his room upstairs, despite his loud footsteps still left his younger brother snoring on the couch. With a huff, Dean got dressed in jeans and a t-shirt, grumbling to himself as he shoved his feet in his boots. "Isis, I hate that bitch… can't wait to ice her." With brush in hand, Dean ran it through his slightly tangled hair until it was completely smooth. He grabbed a hairband from the nightstand and put his hair up in a simple ponytail, his blood boiling as he became more and more enraged at the bitch of a goddess. He went back down to the first floor, his face red in anger.

"Dean, I know why Isis took the children. They're a part of a spell," Cas said as his charge came in the room, his voice grave. "Isis is going to sacrifice them."

{Chapter End}


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